Below you will find the most recent version of our devised Fairy Tale script.
A Twist Through the Mirror
PROLOGUE
The play opens with THREE BLIND MICE huddled on stage right. They are deep in conversation, though we don’t hear them. PETER PAN flits from one side of the stage to the other. The THREE BEARS cross the stage on a family outing. We hear whistling and pleasant greetings. GRETEL wanders to center stage and unwraps some candy. LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD enters stage left with a basket of goodies.
LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD: Hi Gretel. What’s on the menu today?
GRETEL: Chocolate coconutties. (She munchies hungrily).
LITTLE RED: (watches incredulously) Can I have a piece?
GRETEL: (with a full mouth) Don’t you have some? (motioning to her basket)
LITTLE RED: Well, sure, but these are for my grandma. Bran muffins and stuff.
GRETEL: (considers her for a moment. Breaks off a tiny piece of her chocolate coconuttie and graciously hands it to LITTLE RED).
LITTLE RED: Thanks. (throws piece in mouth.) I’m going to my grandma’s, wanna come?
GRETEL: (shrugs) Sure.
Little Red: (directed offstage) MOM! Gretel’s gonna go with me!
MOM: (offstage) Alright, honey. You two be careful! The woods have gotten very dangerous lately.
LITTLE RED: (over her shoulder) I know! Sheesh. (They cross to stage left and cautiously listen in on the 3 blind mice)
VIRGINIA: -that’s what I told him! And he didn’t believe me!
APRICOT: Hmph! Figures.
VIRGINIA: He’s never been the sharpest tool in the crayon box.
LILY: Doesn’t he know what the Evil Queen is capable of?
APRICOT: I know Lily dear. There are only 3 left who aren’t completely rotten. We still have a chance.
VIRGINIA: You know what I woulda told that thick-headed boy? I woulda said “Now listen here Pino-“
APRICOT: (hushed, urgent whisper) Hold it! Do you smell that? (Suspicious, she begins to sniff around, smelling LITTLE RED, GRETEL and the goodies. The other mice join in on the sniffing).
LITTLE RED and GRETEL tip toe away from the mice and run off stage.
VIRGINIA: Well, whatever it was, it’s gone now.
LILY: Apricot, do you really think that she’s going to – you know.
APRICOT: I’m not sure Lily. But I do feel something awful’s coming.
SCENE I
On center stage, sits a small gym bench with a panel room divider behind it. CINDERELLA, SNOW WHITE, and AURORA enter from stage right in matching gym clothes and curled hair in pony tails. CINDERELLA carries a very girly duffle bag. They talk as they walk to center stage.
CINDERELLA: I can’t wait to get out of these ugly gym clothes. Goes behind a panel room divider to change into street clothes.
SNOW WHITE: You’re telling me!
SNOW WHITE and AURORA begin to take off shoes.
SNOW WHITE: picking up a previous conversation. So anyways, I totally had to clean up after him.
AURORA: Seriously?
SNOW WHITE: Yeah. My little brother made such a mess in the kitchen. I seriously could not believe it. He can be such a pig sometimes. Goes behind panel to change.
CINDERELLA: from behind panel. Hey, I can’t find my other shoe. Has anyone seen it?
AURORA: Yeah.
Beat.
CINDERELLA: So where is it, Rose?
AURORA: yawns. I’m too tired to tell you.
CINDERELLA: emerges from behind panel fully clothed in a light blue shirt, dark jeans, and one white flat in hand. Oh my gosh. Don’t you two ever pay attention to me?! Puts single shoe on.
AURORA: directs movements to front of stage, as if looking at a mirror on the wall and starts to finger the bags under her eyes. Not hearing Cinderella. Do you guys notice these bags under my eyes? I totally did not get enough beauty sleep last night.
CINDERELLA: What was that little Miss Lazy Eye? Stands in front of the mirror and starts to fix her hair/makeup.
AURORA: Oh my gosh. You are so rude. Goes behind panel to change.
SNOW WHITE: emerges from behind panel with dark blue shirt, yellow capris and dainty flats. She shakes her hair out of its restraint. Okay, let’s go to lunch. I’m starving.
AURORA: from behind panel. Well, yeah, I would be too if I was on your dumb diet.
SNOW WHITE: Hey, restricting yourself to apples only diet keeps a person in peak condition. I don’t want any fat rolls, okay?
CINDERELLA: Yeah, not like that one girl in gym class. Holy cow!
SNOW WHITE: Yeah…I feel kind of bad for her actually.
AURORA: Seriously?
CINDERELLA: Why?
SNOW WHITE: Well, she doesn’t really have any friends and, well – never mind. That’s stupid. It’s her own fault. Stands next to Cinderella and primps in the mirror.
AURORA: Yes it is. Emerges from behind the panel in a soft pink summer dress with pink shoes.
SNOW WHITE: musing to herself. I look really good today.
AURORA: joins them in front of the mirror. Sara, do you have some lipstick?
SNOW WHITE: I don’t share my lipstick, remember?
AURORA: Cindy?
CINDERELLA: Of course I do. Reaches into duffle bag for the lip stick.
AURORA: Oh, thanks. I totally forgot mine today. I don’t know how, I always take it with me.
CINDERELLA: You have to be prepared. Being beautiful isn’t easy.
The three princesses stand primping in front of the mirror. From behind the panel divider, a small wooden boy cautiously comes behind princesses and pushes them through the mirror.
SCENE II
The three princesses stand in a forested area, clearly not their high school, they are bewildered and disoriented.
CINDERELLA: What. The. Heck??
AURORA: Oh my gosh.
SNOW WHITE: Where are we?
AURORA: This isn’t like any place I’ve ever seen before.
SNOW WHITE: It’s beautiful. Starts to cautiously wander around.
CINDERELLA: groans.
AURORA: Hey, get back here. You don’t know what’s out there.
CINDERELLA: Yeah, you get back here. If it wasn’t for you, we wouldn’t be here in the first place!
SNOW WHITE: Excuse me??? Turning back to CINDERELLA.
AURORA: Yeah! You took five years staring at your face in the mirror!
SNOW WHITE: I took five years??? What about little miss “I need more lipstick!”
AURORA: At least I had both of my shoes on!
CINDERELLA: Don’t you dare drag me into this, Rose. This is your fault!
AURORA: No it’s yours!
SNOW WHITE: Oh it’s totally your fault!
Girls continue arguing as the THREE BEARS, who were out on a leisurely stroll, stop dead in their tracks as they happen upon the Princesses. Each bear has brown clothing on, with distinctive accessories to their character. As all three Princesses see the bears, they freeze mid-sentence, eyes wide and mouths agape.
BABY BEAR peers closer at AURORA and cautiously approaches her.
BABY BEAR: Goldilocks?
AURORA: What?
CINDERELLA: Oh my gosh.
AURORA: That is so not my name. It’s Rose.
SNOW WHITE: Who are you?
The PRINCESSES are stunned.
BABY BEAR: I’m Baby Bear.
MAMA: Pulls him back. Baby Bear!
BABY: It’s okay mom! They’re nice.
PAPA: Son, we’ve told you not to talk to strangers.
BABY: But I’m not! It’s Goldilocks.
MAMA: I don’t think that’s Goldilocks, Baby Bear.
PAPA: I agree, who are those other girls with her anyway? How do we know they’re not plotting something against us?
MAMA: Stealing our honey!
PAPA: Breaking our chairs!
MAMA: Eating our porridge!
PAPA: Sleeping in our beds!
CINDERELLA: Uh, you know we’re right here, right?
PAPA: I’d say we’d better go, wouldn’t you Mama?
MAMA: Indeed. Let’s shove off, Baby.
PAPA and MAMA escort BABY back the way they came. BABY turns back and waves.
BABY: Bye!
The PRINCESSES seem almost paralyzed.
AURORA: That was…strange.
SNOW WHITE: Yeah, I’ve never actually seen bears who were afraid of humans.
CINDERELLA: Me either.
CINDERELLA/AURORA/SNOW WHITE: realization of what just happened. Oh my gosh! Bears! Talking bears! Holy cow!
CINDERELLA: What is going on here!?
SNOW WHITE: starting to panic. We just saw talking bears!
CINDERELLA: What do we do???
SNOW WHITE: What other dangerously lethal killers are in this forest?!
CINDERELLA: Probably a lot!
AURORA: Okay! Calm down. They walked away from us. They were afraid of us.
SNOW WHITE: Right, it’s okay. We’re okay.
BABY: runs back to the Princesses. If you ever want to play, you can come to my house anytime. You go past the great oak tree, take a left at crocodile pond, up Jack and Jill’s hill, turn right into the forest, don’t fall into any pits ok? and my house is on the other side of the forest.
PAPA/MAMA: offstage. Baby!
BABY: Coming! Bye!
The Princesses are petrified.
SNOW WHITE: Okay, let’s just go sit down.
AURORA: Yeah, sit down.
Beat
CINDERELLA: This is ridiculous.
The menacing howl of a wolf is heard off stage. The Princesses’ hearts stop, then in a frenzy, they run off stage right.
During the scene change, the BEARS, the PRINCESSES and LITTLE RED and GRETEL all run cautiously on stage at different times.
SCENE III
Princesses reenter from stage right, still running frantically from the wolf, and literally run into LITTLE RED and GRETEL, both of whom were running away from the wolf as well. LITTLE RED and GRETEL end up on the floor and look up at CINDERELLA.
LITTLE RED: Cinderella?
CINDERELLA: Uh, it’s Cindy.
LITTLE RED: standing up Sure, whatever. My name is Red.
AURORA: Hands on hips. As in Little Red Riding Hood?
LITTLE RED: Uh, yeah. This is Gretel.
GRETEL: Pleasure. Sticks out a candy covered hand.
AURORA: Hmm.
Wolf howls again off stage. SNOW WHITE and AURORA huddle around CINDERELLA
CINDERELLA: Tell me we’re not the only ones hearing that.
GRETEL: Oh we’re hearing it alright.
LITTLE RED: The woods have been really dangerous lately.
AURORA: Like, what?
LITTLE RED: Creatures go missing all the time, the wolf goes hunting at night, I mean, just last week my grandmother got eaten by that very same wolf and she had to undergo major surgery.
Starts to cry, Gretel tries to comfort her.
GRETEL: It’s been a tough week for her.
SNOW WHITE: Oh my gosh, kneels down my LITTLE RED, I’m so sorry. Is she going to be ok?
LITTLE RED: wipes at nose. Yeah. Barely, if she had been in there a moment longer, she would have started to be…digested! Sobs.
CINDERELLA: disgusted. Oh my.
SNOW WHITE: shoots Cinderella a look. Seeing Little Red’s basket…Are these for her?
LITTLE RED: What? Oh, uh huh. I take her goodies every Tuesday and Friday nights.
GRETEL: Speaking of which, we’d better get going before it gets dark. Things get really scary in these woods at night. Pull yourself together, Red. Come on.
GRETEL and LITTLE RED gather their things and their composer and walk away.
LITTLE RED: Good bye princesses.
GRETEL: Nice to meet you.
They exit.
SNOW WHITE: Princesses?
CINDERELLA: Yeah, did you hear her call me Cinderella? I mean, I know I’m beautiful, but I’m a real person. Gosh.
Beat
AURORA: So what do we do?
Beat of uncertainty. The wolf howls. The Princesses shiver.
SNOW WHITE: I don’t know.
CINDERELLA: taking charge. This is ridiculous. Come on. Walks to a nearby tree. Let’s just sit down and think through this.
Princesses sit down, huddled next to tree on stage right. CINDERELLA in middle, AURORA on her right, SNOW WHITE on her left. AURORA yawns.
AURORA: Hey, if I take a nap, you’ll make sure I’m alright, right?
CINDERELLA: scoffs. Pulls out a lip stick from pocket and starts to apply. You’re such a baby. Yeah, fine. Go to sleep.
AURORA: sleepily. You are so rude. Settles into a restless nap.
From stage left, a Fairy darts nimbly into the forest and stops startled when she sees the Princesses. She cautiously floats closer and examines the Princesses closely. Her eyes widen in recognition and she runs off. She reenters with PETER PAN and the TINKERBELL. They quietly gawk at the Princesses.
SNOW WHITE: Pulls out cell phone and begins to tinker with it. No service. Well, this thing is useless. Throws it, unknowingly, in the FAIRY’s direction.
The Fairy picks up the phone, perplexed. She turns it around then hands it to PETER. She motions to everyone to stay where they are and to remain quiet. She darts gracefully off stage. The cell phone gets handed to PETER PAN. He tucks it away.
SNOW WHITE: Will you make sure I’m okay, too?
CINDERELLA: Rolls her eyes. Oh my gosh, Sara. Yeah.
SNOW WHITE joins AURORA in sleep. Both princesses head drift to CINDERELLA’s shoulders. CINDERELLA humphs, but slowly starts to lose consciousness and drifts to sleep.
From stage left, the FAIRY reenters followed by three, old blind MICE. They each wear sunglasses and carry a white cane. Each mouse is dressed in plain gray pant and shirt, yet has many eccentric accessories (e.g., scarves, headbands, jewelry, etc.) that clash in style and color.
The MICE stop center stage and PETER, TINKERBELL run to greet them. They seem to be having a conversation – but we can’t hear it. The MICE motion everyone off stage. They cautiously sniff the air. As the MICE shuffle forward, we see PINOCCHIO enter from one side of the stage and follow PETER, TINKERBELL and the FAIRY off the other side stage. The MICE’s canes awkwardly bump back and forth until they bump upon the PRINCESSES.
The PRINCESSES are instantly awakened and scream at the sight of the MICE. The MICE are startled by the sudden screaming and begin to scream as well.
The PRINCESSES stare at the MICE.
AURORA: What. The. Heck?!
VIRGINIA: What did you call me???
APRICOT: Virginia, relax. Hello, my name is Apricot. This is Virginia and Lily.
LILY: Hello sweet girls.
VIRGINIA: How do you do? Holds out hand for a handshake, but in the wrong direction.
The PRINCESSES look at each other and elbow one another to receive the handshake. SNOW WHITE finally stands up and gives a three-fingered handshake.
SNOW WHITE: Hesitantly Hi, my name is Sar-
VIRGINIA: Oh we know your names! Snow White, Aurora, and Cinderella.
CINDERELLA: Ugh, not this again. Turns away.
LILY: sensing their disbelief Would you ladies care to join us this evening? It gets particularly dark and cold at night out in the open like this.
SNOW WHITE: That would be –
CINDERELLA: Pulls SNOW WHITE and AURORA into a huddle. Wait a second. We don’t even know who these weirdos are. They look disgusting and smell horrible.
AURORA: They do kind of smell like stinky cheese, don’t they?
SNOW WHITE: I don’t know; they’re kind of endearing.
CINDERELLA: But just look at them! How can we trust someone who looks like that???
Pause. The PRINCESSES look over at the MICE who are doing something strange.
SNOW WHITE: Okay, that is weird.
AURORA: Well, what other choice do we have? If they turn out to be as horrible as they really do look, we can just run away. Besides, they are blind. They laugh.
CINDERELLA: laughing That is true. Turning back to the MICE. Why should we trust you anyway??
VIRGINIA: Well, that quote unquote Wolf is on the loose and I wouldn’t want to be caught within a million miles of him.
APRICOT: You need somewhere safe to stay and we can offer it.
LILY: Please, trust us.
CINDERELLA: huffs. Fine, lead the way.
The MICE start to walk in weird patterns on the stage, the Princesses dutifully and silently following behind. After a while…
CINDERELLA: Do you even know where you’re going?
VIRGINIA: No. We’re blind
APRICOT: We use our noses.
Excessive sniffing. They catch a scent and rush off stage. The girls hesitate, look at each other nervously and follow the mice off of stage right.
SCENE IV
ENTER the EVIL QUEEN’S lair. Upstage right is a jail cell where we see the silhouette of a man. Center stage is a glorious throne where the EVIL QUEEN in all of her evil glory, sits.
PINOCCHIO: enters hesitantly from stage left, carrying a rope that leads off stage. He is clearly frightened of the QUEEN. Clears throat. Nothing. Your majesty?
QUEEN: quickly, yet gracefully stands up. She wears a sweeping purple dress with a majestic crown a top her head. Her face is severe and unkind. Ah, Pinocchio darling. You’ve returned at last. She peers anxiously over his shoulder. Beat. Where are they, Pinocchio?
PINOCCHIO: Well, uh, I didn’t get everyone that you waned, but I got Tinkerbell! He yanks on the rope and TINKERBELL stumbles on stage.
QUEEN: indifferent Hmm. Peter let her go so easily?
PINOCCHIO: Well, she got separated from the group, so it was easy to catch her.
QUEEN: Hmm. Put her in the cell.
PINOCCHIO drags her to the jail cell, cautiously opens the door and shoves her in. He turns to face the QUEEN. Awkward silence.
QUEEN: Where are the others, Pinocchio?
PINOCCHIO: Well, uh, you see, it’s kind of a funny story. You see, I used your special magic and pushed them through the mirror, just like we planned. But as soon as we got here, 47 ninjas came outta nowhere and they tied me up to this really pokey bean stalk and – noes grows twice its size.
QUEEN: losing patience. Pinocchio, you had one job. One microscopic job, Pinocchio. And. You. FAILED! Pacing furiously. I should have known that you wouldn’t accomplish the task. How could I have been so foolish as to trust you! You never complete any charge that I give you. You are lazy and insufficient to my needs.
PINOCCHIO: hurt. Hey, just because I’m not a real boy, doesn’t mean that I don’t have real feelings. Wipes at runny nose. Why do you need those girls so bad anyway?
QUEEN: savagely. They’re not simply girls, Pinocchio. They are princesses; sent away many moons ago for “safe keeping.” Those princesses stand in my way to becoming all-powerful. They stand in the way of my marriage to Prince Charming. Walks towards the jail cell-upstage right.
PRINCE CHARMING: In your dreams, you old hag.
QUEEN: Laughs kindly. Oh Charming, Charming, Charming. Life would be so much more exquisite for you if you accepted my generous offer. Untold wealth, all the power you could imagine, and of course, me.
CHARMING: I would rather rot in this cell.
QUEEN: Fortunately for you, that can be arranged. Turns back to Pinocchio. The other princesses fell easily to my plot; vanity and selfishness encroached quickly upon their hearts, kindness never to be found again. But these three, they are far more difficult. They are close to becoming rotten, on the brink of becoming useless to mankind, but they take too long. And I do not have time to spare, Pinocchio. If any inkling of good remains in those Princesses, I won’t succeed. That is why I assigned you to bring them to me. They are not becoming rotten fast enough on their own. They need my…help.
The BIG BAD WOLF enters lazily. He has a satchel draped across his shoulder.
WOLF: Hello.
QUEEN: relieved. Ah, it is you. Rushes to him. Tell me you know of their whereabouts. Pointedly to Pinocchio. Somebody lost them.
WOLF: Unfortunately your royal highness, I lost their scent-
QUEEN: yells incoherently.
WOLF: But they are here, your majesty. All three of ‘em.
QUEEN: Pause, calming down. Bring him to me.
WOLF: Him?
QUEEN: Yes, him! He is the only one competent to handle a task of such vital importance. You! Whips to Pinocchio. Go, get, him and bring him to me. You failed me once Pinocchio, do not fail me again. Your life may depend on it. Go!
PINOCCHIO rushes awkwardly off stage left.
QUEEN paces, then finally sits at her throne.
WOLF: lazily, pulling a piece of food out of his satchel and eating it. So, you’re pulling out the big guns. I’m not good enough for you anymore, huh?
QUEEN: He is the only one conniving enough to do as I demand!
WOLF: The only way he’ll work for you is if you make a deal.
QUEEN: I know that!
Pause
WOLF: What-cha gonna offer him?
QUEEN: Whatever he demands.
WOLF: That could be a pretty high price, your highness.
QUEEN: Do not use that tone with me! And yes it will. But I haven’t an alternative choice; I send Pinocchio, he fails. I send you, you fail. He will not fail.
Enter Pinocchio with a hooded man.
PINOCCHIO: Uh, your majesty, we have returned. He bows deeply.
QUEEN: Ah, at last. Leave us.
WOLF and PINOCCHIO exit.
RUMPELSTILKSTIN: I hear you have a job for me.
QUEEN: Indeed I do. Surely you’ve heard of the…unrest in the forest.
RUMPELSTILKSTIN: Yes…
QUEEN: The three princesses have returned.
RUMPELSTILKSTIN: So I’ve gathered.
QUEEN: And with their return comes my downfall, IF they succeed.
RUMPELSTILKSTIN: I am well aware of the consequences. Pardon my saying so your majesty, but, get to the point.
QUEEN: I need you to stop them at all costs. Traps, distractions, anything! They cannot reach me. They must turn against each other if I am to reign. Any inkling of good they may have left in them needs be destroyed. Do you understand?
RUMPEL: Of course I do.
QUEEN: Can you accomplish this imperative task?
REUMPEL: You know I can. If I may, you know my services come only at a very high price.
The QUEEN acknowledges this.
RUMPEL: What are you willing to trade?
QUEEN: One-fourth of my riches.
RUMPEL: scoffs. Those I don’t need.
QUEEN: A portion of my kingdom.
RUMPEL: Closer.
Beat
QUEEN: Enough with these games, disclose your price.
RUMPEL: I want the mice.
QUEEN: laughs. Why you can’t be serious.
RUMPEL: You have no idea their capabilities.
QUEEN: narrowing her focus. What do you mean “their capabilities”?
RUMPEL: Do you not remember who first sent the princesses away? Do you not realize how much power one would need possess to – stops himself, he realizes he’s giving too much away. That is my price.
QUEEN: suspicious. They are not mine to give.
RUMPEL: But once you become all powerful Queen, everything and everyONE lies in your power. Give me your oath.
QUEEN: You have my solemn word that I shall deliver the mice safely into your hands.
RUMPEL produces a scroll and feather pen from overcoat. He hands the pen to the QUEEN and she signs. He quickly puts it away.
QUEEN: Now, go and do my bidding…..Rumpelstiltskin.
On this final line, Rumpel removes his hood, revealing a crooked and severe face.
Fade to black.
SCENE V
Lights up on the cozy cottage of the three blind MICE. There is a small table with tea on it, a battered couch, books strewn all over a book case and other “homey” items, although nothing matches. APRICOT works on a simple breakfast. LILY sits at the table with a book. VIRGINIA does something very strange on the couch (meditation???).
APRICOT: How did you sleep last night, Lily?
LILY: Oh, it was a restless sleep. And you?
APRICOT: Not too well, I will admit.
VIRGINIA: Are you kidding??? I slept like a log floatin’ down a river of gold.
LILY: So….well then?
VIRIGNIA: Yeah!
LILY: Apricot, I feel quite unsettled.
APRICOT: I know the feeling, Lily. We are about to ask these Princesses to do a very hard thing. I hope they agree.
VIRGINIA: Why wouldn’t they? This is their rightful Kingdom anyway.
APRICOT: But they don’t know that yet. We mustn’t rush them or else we risk losing them forever.
LILY: How do you suggest we handle the situation?
APRICOT: Slowly, we must be slow and gentle in our explanation.
The PRINCESSES enter slowly.
CINDERELLA: Don’t you have a mirror? I can’t fix my hair without one.
VIRGINIA: Good morning to you too.
LILY: Ah, Princesses, how did you sleep?
AURORA: sits down next to VIGINIA. Like a log.
VIRGINIA: Floatin’ down a river of gold?
AURORA: Uh sure.
LILY: turning back to CINDERELLA and SNOW WHITE. And you two?
SNOW WHITE: Oh it was fine.
CINDERELLA: I had a pretty weird dream.
VIRGINIA: A dream???
CINDERELLA: Yes, I was walking in this meadow when all these horribly ugly people popped out of nowhere and were running to me, begging me to help them.
LILY: Oh?
CINDERELLA: They were really ugly though and dressed in rags.
APRICOT: And what did you do?
CINDERELLA: I turned away, obviously.
APRICOT/LILY/VIRGINIA: crestfallen. Oh.
SNOW WHITE: What’s for breakfast?
AURORA: What happened to your “apples only diet?”
SNOW WHITE: Eh, who cares? Besides, whatever Apricot’s cooking looks delicious.
APRICOT: Why don’t you girls sit down, breakfast is ready.
The Princesses sit around a small table as the MICE bring them the food.
LILY: How do you like it here?
SNOW WHITE: Oh, I like it, your house is quite...quaint. It reminds me of my grandma’s house actually. Thinking. Wow, I haven’t been there in a long time.
LILY: I’m sure your grandmother would appreciate a visit from you.
SNOW WHITE: Yeah, she probably would.
AURORA: That is, if we ever get home.
CINDERELLA: Yeah! Where the heck are we?
The MICE appear hesitant.
APRICOT: You have returned home.
CINDERELLA: Home?! No, my home is in Mesquite.
LILY: You used to live here.
VIRGINIA: Darn tooting. You three were the best rulers we ever saw.
AURORA: Wait, rulers?
APRICOT: In our land, we had many rulers, many Queens and Kings. The three of you were each being prepared to rule a section of the kingdom. Snow White, the animals of the Kingdom; Aurora, the peasants of the Kingdom; and Cinderella, the dignitaries of the Kingdom. But there was one among you who was corrupt, who wanted the power for herself. We call her, The Evil Queen.
CINDERELLA: The Evil Queen? You have got to be–
SNOW WHITE: Shh!
APRICOT: She waged a war on our land. But not by bloodshed. She waged a different kind of war.
LILY: A war on mankind. On the human condition.
APRICOT: Sister turned against sister. Families were torn apart. Vanity and pride encroached upon the hearts of the creatures of the Kingdom. The Queens knew they had to fight the evil that plagued the land, but we felt a deep sinking and despair, we knew they would not succeed. So we sent the three of you away. For…safe keeping.
SNOW WHITE: Safe keeping?
AURORA: What do you mean?
APRICOT: We had hoped that you would be safe in the human world. Away from the cruelty, the disregard of compassion and kindness. But we were wrong. The human world is filled with vanity, selfishness and cruelty.
SNOW WHITE: Wait, do you have magical powers, or something?
LILY: We used to, but as the Queen has grown in her power, ours diminishes. It is no longer there.
APRICOT: So, like the Queens before you, you too, began to go “rotten.”
SNOW WHITE: Rotten? What does that mean?
VIRGINIA: It means you turned rude, vain and unkind, kid.
LILY: However, the Evil Queen didn’t like how long it was taking for you to become rotten.
SNOW WHITE: So she brought us here?
VIRGINIA: Exactly toots!
APRICOT: Only when all the Princesses are rotten, can she have complete rule over the Kingdom.
Beat.
APRICOT: She brought you here to sabotage you. To “finish you off”. Then she will become our ruler forever.
CINDERELLA: laughs. This is absolutely ridiculous.
SNOW WHITE: I don’t know…it sort of makes sense.
AURORA: indifferent. I guess I can see it.
APRICOT: to Cinderella. As ridiculous as this may seem to you, Princess, all the good is leaving our world. And the only way you can get home to your precious make up and cell phone service is if you defeat the Evil Queen. If you don’t, you stay here forever oozing with vanity, selfishness and disregard for others’ feelings!
VIRGINIA: As if she doesn’t ooze with that already.
CINDERELLA: Hey! You listen here, Ugly. I didn’t ask to come to this freak land. I didn’t ask to be stuck with two of the most annoying girls in school. I didn’t ask to sit around in this messy house listening to three old crazy ladies carry on and on. All I want is to get back to my life and out of yours.
Beat.
VIRGINIA is stunned and hurt. LILY puts an arm around her.
Beat.
APRICOT: The only way you can get home is if you defeat the Evil Queen. When you’re ready to accept that and speak kindly to my friends, you may come back. Until then, please leave. She motions to the door.
CINDERELLA: Gladly! She stalks to the door. Stops, turns around. To AURORA and SNOW WHITE Aren’t you coming?
Beat
SNOW WHITE: shakes her head sadly.
AURORA: I don’t want to “annoy” you.
CINDERELLA exits dramatically, leaving the MICE, AURORA and SNOW WHITE, baffled on stage.
VIRGINIA: That went well.
APRICOT: She’ll come around. Beat. Alright you two, let’s get to work.
Blackout.
SCENE VI
The THREE BEARS sit contentedly outside their cottage on their porch.
PAPA: It is a beautiful day today, isn’t it Mama?
MAMA: It surely is, Papa.
PAPA: The porridge was especially delicious this morning.
MAMA: I’m glad you liked it.
PAPA: Baby, do you have any friends coming over today to play?
BABY: Well, I wanted to play with Squirrel today, but he had to clean his room.
MAMA: Maybe you should be doing the same thing, Baby.
BABY: But I’m busy.
MAMA: laughs Okay, ten more minutes and then you need to start on your own room.
RUMPELSTILTSKIN and the WOLF walk down the path towards the bears. PAPA spots them.
PAPA: Uh, Mama, maybe she should go inside now.
MAMA: And why’s that, Papa?
PAPA: We have visitors.
MAMA: seeing who he’s referring to, she gets nervous. Oh dear. Baby, please go inside.
RUMPEL and the WOLF make it to the porch.
RUMPEL: Don’t make her leave on our account. In fact, she might be able to help us.
PAPA: Rumpel. Wolf.
WOLF: Mr. Bear.
PAPA: What do you need Rumpel?
RUMPEL: Oh, we just wanted to stop by and see how you have been getting along, courtesy of the Queen.
PAPA: Hm.
MAMA: We’ve been doing quite well, thank you.
WOLF: How nice.
BABY sneezes.
RUMPEL: Bless you. Now dear Baby Bear, my you are growing up. How old are you now?
BABY: Seven.
RUMPEL: Seven years old?! You must have lots of friends in the forest.
BABY: Yeah, I do
PAPA: As you can see Rumpel, we are just fine. Thanks for dropping in.
RUMPEL: I do have one question.
PAPA: Of course you do.
WOLF: Menacingly Watch it.
RUMPEL: I’m looking for a good friend of mine.
MAMA: Oh?
RUMPE: Yes. I am, in fact, looking for three young ladies. To BABY, you haven’t seen them, have you?
BABY: Well I did see some girls who looked like Goldilocks.
RUMPEL: Oh, you did now, did you? Where did you see them?
BABY: Down past the –
PAPA: I don’t think that’s right, Baby. We don’t really remember where we saw them.
RUMPEL: Well, you’ll remember, and when you do, you’d better tell me. Isn’t that right, Wolf?
WOLF: You’d better believe it.
PAPA: Why do you care about three young girls?
RUMPEL: Well, the Queen and I were throwing a party and wanted to invite them.
BABY: Oh a party!
RUMPEL: Yes! And if you tell us anything you know about the girls, we will invite you too.
PAPA: Well, we don’t remember anything. So you can be on your way.
RUMPEL: We’ll be back, Bear. Don’t think you can evade us forever.
WOLF: Bye
They leave.
MAMA: Papa, what was that about?
PAPA: I’m not sure, Mama. But I don’t feel good about it.
MAMA: There was certainly a strange feeling, wasn’t there?
PAPA: Baby, I don’t want you leaving the yard alone.
BABY: But Papa-
PAPA: As long as Rumpel and the Wolf are out and about, we need you here.
BABY: Yes, Papa.
SCENE VII
Cinderella is wandering the forest and sees a boy in green clothing searching out to the audience.
CINDERELLA: You should not be wearing green pants with a green shirt and a green hat. It doesn’t work.
PETER: Huh?
CINDERELLA: Your clothes, they clash.
PETER: Oh, whatever. Considers her for a moment. Hey, you wouldn’t happen to know which way is South, would you?
CINDERELLA: Of course I would, it’s that way. Points.
PETER: Thanks. He starts to leave.
CINDERELLA: Hey, hang on a second. What’s your name?
PETER: Peter Pan!
CINDERELLA: Of course it is.
PETER: What’s yours?
CINDERELLA: It’s Cindy.
PETER: Is that short for Cinderella?
CINDERELLA: exasperated. Sure.
PETER: Wow, I’ve only heard stories about you. Wendy’s told me all about you.
CINDERELLA: Wendy?
PETER: Yeah, she’s my mother.
CINDERELLA: Wonderful.
PETER: Hey, if what she said was true, you really shouldn’t be out here alone.
CINDERELLA: And why is that? I’m just trying to get out of this dang forest.
PETER: Well, first of all, you can’t just “get out” of this forest, the only way you can get out is by defeating the Evil Queen.
CINDERELLA: Yup, I’ve heard that one before.
PETER: Second, I’ve heard that Rumpelstiltskin and the Wolf are hunting you down.
CINDERELLA: They’re…what?
PETER: Hunting you down! You know- hi yah! Uh! Whamp! Bam! Each sound is accompanied by a karate move.
CINDERELLA: Okay…
PETER: Seriously, your majesty. If they find you, you’re dead meat.
Wolf howl.
PETER: Well, see ya!
CINDERELLA: Wait a second! Uh…could I, maybe, just for a minute, come with you? The idea of being hunted down doesn’t exactly appeal to me.
PETER: Yeah, sure, whatever. But I can’t take you to Neverland because you can’t fly and I can’t find Tink.
CINDERELLA: Yeah, yeah, just get me out of here.
PETER: Okay, let’s go.
They rush off stage as RUMPEL and the WOLF enter, out of breath.
RUMPEL: Uhhh!!! We’re too late! After them!
WOLF: trying to catch his breath. Give, me, a, minute.
RUMPEL: This isn’t working! We need to regroup. Obviously you aren’t as good of tracker as you said you were. I need to employ different strategies. He starts to exit the same way he came on.
WOLF: Hey, wait up.
RUMPEL: turns around sharply. I am through waiting for you. If you want the Queen to spare your life, keep up.
They dash off stage.
SCENE VIII
Outside the MICE’s cottage. AURORA and SNOW WHITE have packs on their backs and are saying goodbye to the mice.
SNOW WHITE: Thank you for everything, Apricot. They embrace. You, Virginia and Lily have been so kind to us.
APRICOT: It was our pleasure.
VIRGINIA: Just don’t get squashed out there, okay?
AURORA: Sure…
LILY: You’ll do great. Just remember what we taught you.
APRICOT: You have the map?
SNOW WHITE: In my bag.
LILY: You have warm clothing?
SNOW WHITE: Also in my bag.
VIRGINIA: Ya got cookies?
AURORA: In MY bag!
Virginia initiates a high five.
APRICOT: Good luck out there. As soon as you find her, go straight to the Queen. Time is slipping away.
SNOW WHITE: smiles kindly. Goodbye. They start to walk away.
VIRGINIA: Smell you later!
AURORA: good-naturedly. That’s yourself you’re smelling, Virginia! The PRINCESSES exit.
VIRGINIA: smells her armpit. Oh sweet Neptune. She’s right.
SCENE IX
AURORA and SNOW WHITE have traveled many hours in the forest and are weary. The enter from stage right and are wearing down. Their previously cheerful attitudes begin to wear off.
AURORA: I’m starting to get really tired, Sara.
SNOW WHITE: So am I, Rose!
The trek on.
AURORA: Could we stop somewhere?
SNOW WHITE: Where exactly would you like to stop? We’re in the middle of nowhere.
AURORA: Well – I guess you’re right. Let’s keep going. Beat. Do you think we’ll ever find Cindy? She was pretty upset when she left.
SNOW WHITE: I know.
AURORA: Honestly, I’m still kind of man at her. She called us annoying. Why would she be friends with us if she thought we were annoying?
SNOW WHITE: Shrugs. I guess when people are upset, they can say some mean things. Maybe that’s all it was. But I’m with you, she kind of hurt my feelings.
AURORA: Mine too.
SNOW WHITE: But I am sort of worried about her. She’s out wandering alone somewhere and she has no idea what’s going on.
AURORA: An Evil Queen hunting us down, you mean?
SNOW WHITE: laughs dryly. Yeah.
AURORA: Sometimes, if I think about it too long, I start to doubt it. Like, this whole thing is just some ridiculous made up thing.
SNOW WHITE: It does seem pretty crazy and weird, huh?
AURORA nods.
SNOW WHITE: Well, don’t think about it too hard then. Let’s just get this done and then we can go home. It seems like the only way.
AURORA nods again. They begin to trek onward again, but GRETEL and LITTLE RED enter from stage right, moaning and holding their stomachs.
SNOW WHITE: Gretel! Red! Are you two alright?
RED: Oh, Snow White!
GRETEL: No, I have a horrible stomach ache and I think I may puke.
RED: Me too.
AURORA: Ew.
SNOW WHITE: Do you have the stomach flu or something?
GRETEL: No, I just ate too much candy. This usually happens once a week or so.
RED: This doesn’t happen to me very often since my mom makes me eat whole wheat bread and muffins.
GRETEL: Those muffins are disgusting, Red, full of oats and stuff.
RED: Well your teeth are going to rot out of your head someday, Gretel.
GRETEL: Yeah, yeah.
AURORA: Well, we wish we could help, but we got to get going.
SNOW WHITE: Rose, come on. They clearly need some help; a drink of water or something. Taking GRETEL’s other side. There’s got to be a well around here somewhere
AURORA: Whoa, hang on a second Sara. We need to get going.
SNOW WHITE: Rose, this will only take a second and they obviously need help.
AURORA: Someone else can give it. We need to defeat the Queen together.
SNOW WHITE: If I don’t help them, who will?
AURORA: Well, what the heck am I supposed to do?
SNOW WHITE: You could come along?
AURORA: No thanks.
SNOW WHITE: Okay, fine. You keep looking for Cindy and meet me back here in an hour.
AURORA: Fine.
SNOW WHITE: Okay, a well, a river, anything. Lead the way. They begin to exit. Bye Rose, be careful out there.
AURORA: See you soon!
SNOW WHTE, GRETEL and RED exit. AURORA is left center stage.
AURORA: Well, this is great. Alright Cindy. You’d better not be far. Begins to walk off-stage, but hesitates. You know, a little nap probably wouldn’t hurt any. Besides, it’s probably getting close to bedtime anyway, right? Sure. Crosses center stage to some soft looking grass that has a canopy of leaves above it. Oh yeah, that looks nice. Begins to settle in. Ah yeah, this is the life. Drifts to sleep.
Several beats of stillness. Then, PETER PAN runs on frantically from stage left, but the WOLF runs from stage right and RUMPELSTILTSKIN runs on behind PETER PAN, trapping him.
WOLF: Where did she go?! He lunges at PETER.
PETER: dodges the WOLF. I don’t know! She saw you coming and ran off!
WOLF: You lie!!! He lunges again.
AURORA awakes. Alarmed and frightening by what she sees, she hides deeper into her napping place.
PETER dodges the WOLF once again.
RUMPEL: Stop! He lifts his hand to the WOLF. Peter Pan is a foolish boy. But surely he knows where Cinderella is. He has heard the stories. But, perhaps, if he won’t tell us, he will tell The Queen.
PETER: backs away. Oh, no, no, no. Not her.
RUMPEL: Oh yes.
RUMPEL and the WOLF lunge one final time and catch PETER. RUMPEL and the WOLF have their back to her, so they don’t see AURORA peeking over the leaves. But PETER does.
RUMPEL: menacingly. I’ll give you one final time to tell us where she went.
PETER looks to AURORA, her eyes wide. With final resolve, he shouts “NEVER!”
RUMPEL: Very well. RUMPEL and the WOLF drag him off.
AURORA is shocked by what she has seen. After a moment, she cautiously comes from her hiding place.
AURORA: Cindy! She must be nearby!
Suddenly, from upstage, we see the beautiful FAIRY dance towards us. She moves fluidly and gracefully. It’s as if the world holds its breath and time stands still when the FAIRY moves. Slowly, yet with purpose, she moves towards AURORA. AURORA doesn’t seem at all frightened, in fact, she seems to be in a trance, watching the beautiful creature dance towards her.
AURORA: Who are you?
The FAIRY says nothing, yet moves in a way that AURORA seems to recognize.
AURORA: You’re the Fairy. With new realization You’re the Fairy!!! Oh my gosh! She runs to her and the two embrace. You know where she is, don’t you?
The FAIRY smiles knowingly and softly nods her head.
AURORA: Can you take me to her?!
She turns in a beautiful pirouette and motions for AURORA to follow her.
AURORA: Yes, yes! I’ll follow.
The Fairy flits off stage right with AURORA on her heels calling after her “Thank you, thank you!”
SCENE X
The THREE BLIND MICE’s cottage. The three MICE busy themselves with household work. PINOCCHIO knocks on the door.
LILY: opens the door and is surprised at what she sees. Pinocchio!
PINOCCHIO: Hello. May I come in?
LILY: Of course, of course. Is everything alright?
PINOCCHIO: I was hoping I could talk to the three of you.
APRICOT: What happens to be the problem?
PINOCCHIO: The Evil Queen is the problem.
VIRIGNIA: Ha! That’s an understatement.
LILY: What seems to be on your mind?
PINOCCHIO: I can’t do it anymore.
VIRGINIA: Can’t do what?
PINOCCHIO: The Evil Queen. She promised me all sorts of wealth and power if I helped her and I don’t have any of those things. Besides, I’m just not happy anymore. She treats me like dirt.
APRICOT: She can be truly cruel, can’t she?
PINOCCHIO: Uh huh. And she calls me names and threatens me. Plus, she holds random creatures hostage. Like, the Prince. She’s had him there for who knows how long, she’s has Tinkerbell locked up and I heard that Peter Pan got captured too.
LILY: My, my, my.
PINOCCHIO: I don’t want to serve her anymore, but I need help.
VIRGINA: Hold on a second, how do we know you’re not a spy.
APRICOT: Virginia, please. This is Pinocchio, after all.
VIRGINIA: Oh. Sorry.
APRICOT: Pinocchio, you are brave coming here, as I’m sure the Queen has all sorts of spies out, but you don’t need our help. You can decide for yourself who you will and will not serve.
LILY: That’s right. You are in charge of your own happiness.
PINOCCHIO: And I want to be! That’s why I want to help you!
VIRGINIA: Us?
PINOCCHIO: Yes, the war against the Evil Queen needs to come to an end and I want to help. I want to be on the right side for once. The way the Evil Queen treats people……no one deserves that.
LILY: You’re right Pinocchio. Kindness is always better than cruelty.
PINOCCHIO: What can I do?
VIRGINIA: Cinderella!
APRICOT: She’s lost. Find her. Take her to the Queen.
PINOCCHIO: What?! Are you crazy!?
APRICOT: Snow White and Aurora are making their way to her fortress right now. They’ll need Cinderella’s help if they want to defeat the Queen.
PINOCCHIO: What if she doesn’t listen to me?
LILY: Just be honest and kind. That’s all we can ask of you.
PINOCCHIO: Okay, I think I can do that.
LILY: You can.
PINOCCHIO: Thanks! I’ll go find her right now! He leaves.
APRICOT: That was surprising.
LILY: I had always hoped he’d come around.
SCENE XI
CINDERELLA stumbles on from stage right, she has twigs in her hair and a disheveled appearance. Unknown to her, PINOCCHIO follows behind.
CINDERELLA: mumbling to herself. I hate trees. She begins to pick off the twigs and other flora and fauna. I hate bushes. I hate plants. I hate this forest. She rummages in her pocket for a pocket mirror. She finds one and begins fixing her appearance. She adlibs about how awful she looks and feels.
PINOCCHIO: You know what would fix that?
CINDERELLA: visibly jumps. Holy cow! Sheesh, don’t scare me like that.
PINOCCHIO: Sorry.
CINDERELLA: Were you following me?
PINOCCHIO: Pause. Uh huh.
CINDERELLA: Get away from me.
PINOCCHIO: Wait! Please listen! You have to defeat the Queen! I know what terrible things she is capable of, trust me. But I can lead you to her!
CINDERELLA: Why would I want to do that? What’s your name anyway?
PINOCCHIO: I’m Pinocchio. Listen, Cinderella, your friends are headed there right now to try and defeat her on their own. But they need you. This is the only way for things to go back to normal.
CINDERELLA: I don’t really care. Beat. But, I do really wanna get out of here. And if that means I have to defeat some Evil Queen, okay, whatever. Just give me a minute to fix my hair. She distances herself from PINOCCHIO and sits down hopelessly, her hair forgotten.
From stage right, enters a frantic PAPA BEAR, he sees CINDERELLA and runs to her.
PAPA: Oh Goldilocks!
CINDERELLA: It’s Cindy.
PAPA: Stops dead in his tracks. Cinderella? Pardon me. He gives a slight bow. Do you think you could help us? Poor Baby got caught in a trap and I just can’t get her out. My paws are too big! We need someone with small hands.
CINDERELLA: dryly Ask him. Motioning to PINOCCHIO.
PINOCCHIO: Hey, I don’t do blood.
CINDERELLA: Okay, where is she?
PAPA: I’ll go get her, Mama is sitting with her! He runs back on stage right and reenters with MAMA, both are carrying BABY BEAR. BABY has a trap ensnared around her leg and her face is tear stricken.
BABY: whimpering. This really hurts, Mama.
MAMA: I know sweetheart. You’re being so brave. Cinderella here will help you.
CINDERELLA comes closer to view BABY BEAR and is horrified at what she sees.
CINDERELLA: Oh my gosh. When did this happen? She gingerly touches the trap.
PAPA: Twenty minutes ago, I’d say. Wouldn’t you, Mama?
MAMA: Yes, 20 minutes sounds right.
CINDERELLA: What were you doing? Where was this?
PAPA: Out about ½ mile from the Dwarves’ cottage.
MAMA: We were out on a picnic. This kind of thing has never happened before.
PAPA: Never even heard of something like this happening before.
MAMA: Can you get it off?
CINDERELLA: I’ll try. This looks pretty bad. Poor Baby, how are your toes?
BABY: They hurt.
CINDERELLA: Good, that means there’s still some blood flow. Examining the trap. Wow, this is a pretty intricate snare. I mean, I don’t hunt things, obviously she tosses her hair, but look at this detail. She motions MAMA and PAPA closer. There’s writing on it, do you see?
PAPA: “EQ will reign forever.”
CINDERELLA: EQ?
PINOCCHIO: The Evil Queen.
CINDERELLA: Oh.
MAMA: Never mind the writing. Please get this off, Cinderella.
CINDERELLA: I guess I’ll try.
She fumbles around with the chains and snare. BABY BEAR continues to whimper softly, trying to be brave. MAMA sits next to her, comforting her.
CINDERELLA: Ouch! She pulls out her hand and shakes it off. That thing is sharp.
BABY: Don’t I know it!
CINDERELLA: I’m sorry, Baby. She studies it a moment longer. Okay, I think I figured it out. Hold your breath. She gives a swift and forceful pull. The trap comes off as BABY inhales sharply. CINDERELLA looks closely at the trap, then throws it several feet away. Ew. That thing was nasty. She turns her attention to BABY BEAR who is still in shock and holding on to MAMA fiercely. Are you okay, Baby?
BABY nods shakily.
CINDERELLA: looks closer at the wounds. That’s gonna need some bandage or some Neosporin or something. You don’t have any?
MAMA: No, none at all.
CINDERELLA: Pinocchio? Sighs, reaches into her pocket. This chapstick is my favorite. It’s has mango butter, vitamins e and a, coconut oil, and beeswax. It’s the most moisturizing chapstick that I’ve ever owned. She looks at it longingly, then hands it to BABY. Here. It will have to do till you can get some stitches or Neosporin or whatever.
BABY: Thank you.
MAMA: Yes, thank you Cinderella. You saved our Baby.
CINDERELLA: Yeah, yeah.
MAMA and PAPA hug BABY whispering softly, making sure that BABY is okay. CINDERELLA looks on longingly. Is she missing her friends?
CINDERELLA: Well, take me to the Evil Queen.
Suddenly from stage left, AURORA pops out of nowhere, she is followed by the FAIRY.
AURORA: Not without me, you don’t!
CINDERELLA and AURORA regard each other for a moment, then AURORA runs into CINDERELLA’S arms.
AURORA: I’m glad you’re okay, Cindy. Really. Sara and I were pretty worried.
CINDERELLA: overcome by her friend’s sincerity. Yeah, so was I. Where is she anyway?
AURORA: She’s helping Gretel and Little Red, they were pretty sick. And I promised to meet her. Come on! She takes CINDERELLA’s hand and starts to drag her off stage.
CINDERELLA: Wait! She runs to the THREE BEARS. Bye, Baby. Bye Mama. Bye Papa.
MAMA: Thank you so much, CINDERELLA.
Pause
CINDERELLA: Thanks. She smiles softly and runs back to AURORA. Okay, come Pinocchio. Let’s go.
SCENE XII
The Evil Queen’s lair. She sits on her throne as RUMPEL and the WOLF drag Peter Pan in. She laughs in delight.
QUEEN: Ah, the famous Peter Pan.
PETER gets thrown at her feet.
QUEEN: Aren’t you a little lost?
PETER: He spots TINK in the jail cell and tries to run to her. Tink!!!
The WOLF stops him in his tracks.
QUEEN: Come, come Peter. We must have a little chat. I know you know where they are.
PETER: I don’t.
QUEEN: Don’t you? I have sources that tell me that you were seen traipsing through the forest with Cinderella.
At her name, the PRINCE jumps and listens intently.
QUEEN: Tell me where she is.
PETER: I don’t know where she is.
QUEEN: You lie!
PETER: I don’t! She saw your two henchmen over there and ran off. She’s not an idiot!
QUEEN: Unlike you.
PETER: Insult me if it makes you feel better, but I’m not talking.
QUEEN: Pity. Lock him away.
The WOLF grabs him and shoves him towards the jail cell in the back.
QUEEN: My, my. My little cell is getting quite crowded, don’t you think? Take him to the dungeons.
TINK: No!!!!!
The QUEEN laughs as PETER is dragged off stage.
PRINCE: You’re disgusting.
QUEEN: Thank you. It’s one of my better qualities.
PRINCE: You’re not going to get away with this.
QUEEN: I already am. She waltzes off with RUMPEL at her heels.
PRINCE: I’m sorry, Tink. You risked so much by allowing yourself to be captured. And now it appears to have been for nothing.
TINK: Not nothing, your highness. We are one step closer to getting our Kingdom back as it was.
PRINCE: How can you say so? More creatures get summoned to the dungeon every hour.
TINK: She’s getting nervous, the Evil Queen. So she locks people away. She thinks that somehow, that gives her more control.
PRINCE: catching on to her train of thought. But it doesn’t! It just means that more people will come to free them.
TINK: Exactly.
Beat
PRINCE: I hope they’re not far, Tink. It’s been so long, will she even remember me?
TINK: Maybe not at first, but I think she will. She is Cinderella, after all. I think it will just take time.
PRINCE: And time is exactly what we’re running out of.
SCENE XIII
A water well is center stage and GRETEL and RED sit next to it, drinking cups of water lazily. SNOW WHITE stands nearby.
GRETEL: moans Oh my stomach. I never thought water would taste so good.
RED: Snow, are you okay?
SNOW WHITE: What? Oh yeah, I’m fine. Hey, I just think I should probably get going. I don’t know how long we wandered out here till we found that well, but I promised Rose that I would get back.
GRETEL: Sure, sure. Go ahead. We’re fine here.
SNOW WHITE: Are you sure? I don’t have to leave yet.
RED: Seriously Snow, we’ll be fine.
GRETEL: Now that I feel like my stomach has finally calmed down again.
SNOW WHITE: You know, you really shouldn’t eat so much candy.
GRETEL: Yeah, I know. But it’s so good!
RED: You need help.
Offstage, we hear the call for PINOCCHIO, CINDERELLA, and AURORA all calling for SNOW WHITE.
PINOCCHIO: Snow White!
CINDERELLA/AURORA: Sara! Where are you?
SNOW WHITE: Oh my gosh! I’m over here!
PINOCCHIO, CINDERELLA, and AURORA run onstage.
SNOW WHITE: Cindy! She runs to her and they embrace.
AURORA: We were worried about you, Sara.
SNOW WHITE: I’m fine, really. But we need to get going. I feel like we’re running out of time.
AURORA: I know, me too. I keep getting this sinking feeling and I’ve never had that before.
SNOW WHITE: Yeah, me either. Let’s go.
CINDERELLA: Hang on. This is hard for her, so she rushes through it. Sara, Rose, I’m sorry for those things that I said back in the Mice’s cottage. I was scared, angry, I don’t know. But I’m sorry.
SNOW WHITE: It’s okay, Cindy. We get it.
AURORA: Yeah, it’s whatever.
Pause.
PINOCCHIO: Hey, can we go now?
CINDERELLA: Oh, yeah, sure. Come on.
They exit off stage right.
RED: Bye, Princesses!
GRETEL: See ya, wouldn’t wanta be ya!
RED: with a pointed look to GRETEL, You need so much help.
GRETEL: Oh come on, I wouldn’t want to defeat the Evil Queen, would you?
RED: she thinks about it for a minute, Nah. Not by myself anyway.
GRETEL: Exactly. Plus, that Rumpelstiltskin gives me the creeps.
RED: Hm, I know what you mean. Sometimes I wonder if-
She’s cut off by VIRGINIA who enters from stage left.
VIRGINIA: I can smell ‘em! I’m so close!
APRICOT and LILY enter behind her.
VIRGINIA: Ah ha! She bumps into GRETEL and LITTLE RED.
GRETEL: Hey!
RED: Come on!
VIRGINIA: You’re not the Princesses!
GRETEL: Nope.
RED: Certainly am not.
APRICOT: Virginia, you need your nose checked.
VIRGINIA: I do not!
LILY: Really?
VIRGINIA: Well, maybe it wouldn’t hurt.
APRICOT: Gretel, Red Riding Hood! The Princesses, have they made it to the Queen’s lair.
RED: Not yet.
GRETEL: But they’re on their way.
RED: Snow White helped us to this here well –
GRETEL: We were not feeling too well –
RED: Nope, we weren’t –
GRETEL: But anyways, we were just hanging out here and Cinderella and Aurora found us here and they just left.
RED: Yeah, like 2 minutes ago.
GRETEL: Pinocchio is leading them.
LILY: Oh bless that boy!
RED: Yeah, and the Fairy too.
VIRGINIA: I always told you I liked that fairy, haven’t I?
APRICOT: Girls, we’re headed there now. Those Princesses are going to need all the help they can get. With all of us working together, surely Cinderella, Snow White and Aurora can defeat her.
LILY: Come with us. The Queen won’t go down easily.
APRICOT: With the return of the Princesses, we can be strong enough to stand for what’s right.
VIRGINIA: Amen, sister!
RED: Sure, I always liked them.
GRETEL: Yeah, me too. Except I’m not sure I’m up to defeating the Evil Queen today.
RED: Oh please, Gretel. They can’t do it by themselves.
VIRGINIA: Don’t worry toots, we got your back.
GRETEL: Uhh, okay. But only because I’m feeling better.
APRICOT: We have a Queen to defeat. Come.
They all scurry off stage.
SCENE XIV
The Queen’s Evil Lair. CINDERELLA, AURORA, PINOCCHIO, and the FAIRY quietly and cautiously dart on.
PINOCCHIO: This is it.
AURORA: I can’t believe she’d leave her castle unprotected. Surely she knew we were coming.
CINDERELLA: Something doesn’t feel right.
PINOCCHIO: Cinderella, look! He points to the cell in the back.
CINDERELLA: Who’s there?
TINK: It’s Tink, and Prince Charming.
CINDERELLA: Prince Charming?
SNOW WHITE: Where’s the key?
AURORA: slowly, suspiciously, It’s right here. She gingerly picks up the key from a side table. It seems too easy. Apricot said defeating the Queen would test us unlike anything we’d even experienced.
CINDERELLA: Come on Sara, she grabs the key, We don’t have time for this. The sooner we get out of here, the better.
She unlocks the key and TINK flies out
TINK: Peter is in the dungeon. I’ve got to go get him.
PINOCCHIO: I’ll go! You stay! He runs off stage.
SNOW WHITE runs to AURORA and CINDERELLA and they embrace. In the doorway of the cell, PRINCE CHARMING stands and clears his throat. Everyone steps back, except for CINDERELLA. They lock eyes. They share a moment.
CINDERELLA: Hi.
CHARMING: he bows.
CINDERELLA: she stands transfixed, everything else forgotten. I’m Cinderella.
CHARMING: I know. I’d never forget you.
Beat.
CINDERELLA: Should we go?
CHARMING: That sounds like a great idea. He boldly takes her hand and the two lead the rest as they begin to leave.
Without warning, the EVIL QUEEN, RUMPEL, and the WOLF stand in their way.
QUEEN: Oh, going so soon? She stretches her hand forth and in the same smooth movement, pushes the party of escapees physically back. My powers grow stronger every moment that the three of you “princesses” are here. You are worthless. You succumbed easily to the temptations of greed, vanity and selfishness. You place yourself far above others and look down your nose at them. You are rotten. And I have won.
SNOW WHITE: struggling to stand You’ll never win! You’re the greedy one.
AURORA: You’re the one who’s vain.
QUEEN: You think that I don’t know that? You try to insult me with the values I hold most dear. Vanity, selfishness, cruelty, they’re my best features. To RUMPEL and the WOLF, Seize them.
The RUMPEL, and the WOLF surge forward, yet are stopped short. From off stage we hear…
VIRGINIA: singsong. Oh there once was an Evil Queen, she looked like a warty bean. She sits and she rots, on her stinky old cot. Oh how we hate that old Queen.
VIRGINIA enters flanked by APRICOT and LILY. GRETEL, RED stand determinedly behind them.
QUEEN: Oh good, you’ve decided to join us. She uses her other hand to control them and brings them next to the others. Now, this is so delightful. Wouldn’t you say? Control of the entire kingdom is at my fingertips. Hmmm, now what should I do? Rumpel, seize the Princesses, the rest, are, expendable.
CHARMING/MICE/GRETEL/RED/BEARS: How dare you! You’re despicable! No! Please!
QUEEN: Laughs. Oh that I cared. Rumpel!
RUMPEL and the WOLF start forward. Out of nowhere, PINOCCHIO runs center stage.
PINOCCHIO: That’s your problem, your highness. You don’t care and that won’t get you anywhere. Now, Peter!
PETER PAN runs from behind RUMPEL and the WOLF and traps them in rope.
QUEEN: No matter. I can defeat you on my own. The goodness is slipping away, I can feel it.
CINDERELLA: No!
QUEEN: Ah, Cinderella, you can speak.
CINDERELLA: throughout the monologue, she struggles to overcome the Queen’s powers over her. The only one without goodness, is you! You isolate yourself and therefore you are weak. You don’t know what it’s like to have friends that really care about you. You don’t know what it’s like to help a friend in need, or, meet a new one. You don’t know kindness or compassion or love. You are the only cruel, vain and selfish one here. We are strong because we are kind and we have each other. Cinderella stands free and strong in front of the QUEEN. AURORA and SNOW WHITE join CINDERELLA and grab hands. The PRINCE stands on the other side of CINDERELLA and takes her hand. Slowly, and one by one, the creatures overcome the QUEEN’S powers and join hands in front of her.
QUEEN: How dare you! She waves her hands in an effort to gain control over them, but no power is to be had. She has grown weak. Seize them! Rumpelstiltskin! Spotting PINOCCHIO Pinocchio! You worthless, good for nothing-
CINDERELLA: Face it. She slowly circles behind the QUEEN. Your ways have rewarded you with nothing but loneliness and despair.
The line of characters slowly advances on the QUEEN.
PINOCCHIO: runs towards the QUEEN holding the QUEEN’s mirror in his hands. I’ve got it, Cinderella!
CINDERELLA: Now, Pinocchio!
PINOCCHIO takes the mirror in front of the QUEEN as CINDERELLA simultaneously pushes the QUEEN through the mirror.
With a defeated scream, the QUEEN disappears.
Breathless, nobody moves, stunned at what just happened. Then all at once, a joyous eruption. We hear “We did it! Good job! Finally, the Evil Queen is gone!” etc.
AURORA: How did you know what to do?
CINDERELLA: It was Pinocchio’s idea. Thank you Pinocchio, I could’ve have done it without you.
VIRGINIA: Uh, Cinderella, what should we do with them? She stands over RUMPEL and the WOLF
CINDERELLA: I’m not sure, Rose?
AURORA: We could lock them up?
SNOW WHITE: Until they come around?
CINDERELLA: Yeah, good idea. I think they’ll come around eventually.
PINOCCHIO: Way ahead of you, your Majesty. He bows slightly. There’s a bit of a tussle, but PINOCCHIO and PETER PTAN successfully put the WOLF and RUMPEL in the jail cell.
CINDERELLA: to AURORA and SNOW WHITE. It’s over.
AURORA: We could go home.
SNOW WHITE: Yeah.
CINDERELLA: You’re right. We can go home. She steals a subtle glance at the PRINCE.
LILY: picking up on what passed between CINDERELLA and the PRINCE. You don’t have to leave you know.
APRICOT: Now that you are here, our powers have been restored tenfold. We can send you wherever you’d like.
SNOW WHITE: And if we wanted to stay?
APRICOT: We would love that dearly. Our Kingdom needs its rightful rulers…
AURORA: I’m staying. No questions asked.
SNOW WHITE: I’m staying too. This is where I belong.
Pause.
CHARMING: And what about Cinderella? He walks to her. Will you stay?
CINDERELLA: hesitates. I think I have some things that I need to fix in my high school, people who deserve apologies. But I’ll come back. This is my true home.
EPILOGUE
The QUEEN sits center stage as a group of girls in gym clothes enter.
GIRL 1: Ew, what are you wearing?
GIRL 2: Is that a crown? What are you, the Queen of England?
All laugh
GIRL 3: You look ridiculous. Maxi dresses are so last year.
QUEEN: You shall all be punished for this!
GIRL 1: You shall? What, are you living in the eighteenth century?
All laugh and exit as GIRL 4 (who looks vaguely like CINDERELLA) walks up to the QUEEN.
GIRL 4: Hey, are you alright?
QUEEN: Of course, I’m alright.
GIRL 4: Here, can I help you up?
QUEEN: I do not need your help.
GIRL 4 offers her hand and the QUEEN reluctantly takes it.
GIRL 4: Come on, I think I have some extra clothes in my locker.
They walk off stage.
END
The play opens with THREE BLIND MICE huddled on stage right. They are deep in conversation, though we don’t hear them. PETER PAN flits from one side of the stage to the other. The THREE BEARS cross the stage on a family outing. We hear whistling and pleasant greetings. GRETEL wanders to center stage and unwraps some candy. LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD enters stage left with a basket of goodies.
LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD: Hi Gretel. What’s on the menu today?
GRETEL: Chocolate coconutties. (She munchies hungrily).
LITTLE RED: (watches incredulously) Can I have a piece?
GRETEL: (with a full mouth) Don’t you have some? (motioning to her basket)
LITTLE RED: Well, sure, but these are for my grandma. Bran muffins and stuff.
GRETEL: (considers her for a moment. Breaks off a tiny piece of her chocolate coconuttie and graciously hands it to LITTLE RED).
LITTLE RED: Thanks. (throws piece in mouth.) I’m going to my grandma’s, wanna come?
GRETEL: (shrugs) Sure.
Little Red: (directed offstage) MOM! Gretel’s gonna go with me!
MOM: (offstage) Alright, honey. You two be careful! The woods have gotten very dangerous lately.
LITTLE RED: (over her shoulder) I know! Sheesh. (They cross to stage left and cautiously listen in on the 3 blind mice)
VIRGINIA: -that’s what I told him! And he didn’t believe me!
APRICOT: Hmph! Figures.
VIRGINIA: He’s never been the sharpest tool in the crayon box.
LILY: Doesn’t he know what the Evil Queen is capable of?
APRICOT: I know Lily dear. There are only 3 left who aren’t completely rotten. We still have a chance.
VIRGINIA: You know what I woulda told that thick-headed boy? I woulda said “Now listen here Pino-“
APRICOT: (hushed, urgent whisper) Hold it! Do you smell that? (Suspicious, she begins to sniff around, smelling LITTLE RED, GRETEL and the goodies. The other mice join in on the sniffing).
LITTLE RED and GRETEL tip toe away from the mice and run off stage.
VIRGINIA: Well, whatever it was, it’s gone now.
LILY: Apricot, do you really think that she’s going to – you know.
APRICOT: I’m not sure Lily. But I do feel something awful’s coming.
SCENE I
On center stage, sits a small gym bench with a panel room divider behind it. CINDERELLA, SNOW WHITE, and AURORA enter from stage right in matching gym clothes and curled hair in pony tails. CINDERELLA carries a very girly duffle bag. They talk as they walk to center stage.
CINDERELLA: I can’t wait to get out of these ugly gym clothes. Goes behind a panel room divider to change into street clothes.
SNOW WHITE: You’re telling me!
SNOW WHITE and AURORA begin to take off shoes.
SNOW WHITE: picking up a previous conversation. So anyways, I totally had to clean up after him.
AURORA: Seriously?
SNOW WHITE: Yeah. My little brother made such a mess in the kitchen. I seriously could not believe it. He can be such a pig sometimes. Goes behind panel to change.
CINDERELLA: from behind panel. Hey, I can’t find my other shoe. Has anyone seen it?
AURORA: Yeah.
Beat.
CINDERELLA: So where is it, Rose?
AURORA: yawns. I’m too tired to tell you.
CINDERELLA: emerges from behind panel fully clothed in a light blue shirt, dark jeans, and one white flat in hand. Oh my gosh. Don’t you two ever pay attention to me?! Puts single shoe on.
AURORA: directs movements to front of stage, as if looking at a mirror on the wall and starts to finger the bags under her eyes. Not hearing Cinderella. Do you guys notice these bags under my eyes? I totally did not get enough beauty sleep last night.
CINDERELLA: What was that little Miss Lazy Eye? Stands in front of the mirror and starts to fix her hair/makeup.
AURORA: Oh my gosh. You are so rude. Goes behind panel to change.
SNOW WHITE: emerges from behind panel with dark blue shirt, yellow capris and dainty flats. She shakes her hair out of its restraint. Okay, let’s go to lunch. I’m starving.
AURORA: from behind panel. Well, yeah, I would be too if I was on your dumb diet.
SNOW WHITE: Hey, restricting yourself to apples only diet keeps a person in peak condition. I don’t want any fat rolls, okay?
CINDERELLA: Yeah, not like that one girl in gym class. Holy cow!
SNOW WHITE: Yeah…I feel kind of bad for her actually.
AURORA: Seriously?
CINDERELLA: Why?
SNOW WHITE: Well, she doesn’t really have any friends and, well – never mind. That’s stupid. It’s her own fault. Stands next to Cinderella and primps in the mirror.
AURORA: Yes it is. Emerges from behind the panel in a soft pink summer dress with pink shoes.
SNOW WHITE: musing to herself. I look really good today.
AURORA: joins them in front of the mirror. Sara, do you have some lipstick?
SNOW WHITE: I don’t share my lipstick, remember?
AURORA: Cindy?
CINDERELLA: Of course I do. Reaches into duffle bag for the lip stick.
AURORA: Oh, thanks. I totally forgot mine today. I don’t know how, I always take it with me.
CINDERELLA: You have to be prepared. Being beautiful isn’t easy.
The three princesses stand primping in front of the mirror. From behind the panel divider, a small wooden boy cautiously comes behind princesses and pushes them through the mirror.
SCENE II
The three princesses stand in a forested area, clearly not their high school, they are bewildered and disoriented.
CINDERELLA: What. The. Heck??
AURORA: Oh my gosh.
SNOW WHITE: Where are we?
AURORA: This isn’t like any place I’ve ever seen before.
SNOW WHITE: It’s beautiful. Starts to cautiously wander around.
CINDERELLA: groans.
AURORA: Hey, get back here. You don’t know what’s out there.
CINDERELLA: Yeah, you get back here. If it wasn’t for you, we wouldn’t be here in the first place!
SNOW WHITE: Excuse me??? Turning back to CINDERELLA.
AURORA: Yeah! You took five years staring at your face in the mirror!
SNOW WHITE: I took five years??? What about little miss “I need more lipstick!”
AURORA: At least I had both of my shoes on!
CINDERELLA: Don’t you dare drag me into this, Rose. This is your fault!
AURORA: No it’s yours!
SNOW WHITE: Oh it’s totally your fault!
Girls continue arguing as the THREE BEARS, who were out on a leisurely stroll, stop dead in their tracks as they happen upon the Princesses. Each bear has brown clothing on, with distinctive accessories to their character. As all three Princesses see the bears, they freeze mid-sentence, eyes wide and mouths agape.
BABY BEAR peers closer at AURORA and cautiously approaches her.
BABY BEAR: Goldilocks?
AURORA: What?
CINDERELLA: Oh my gosh.
AURORA: That is so not my name. It’s Rose.
SNOW WHITE: Who are you?
The PRINCESSES are stunned.
BABY BEAR: I’m Baby Bear.
MAMA: Pulls him back. Baby Bear!
BABY: It’s okay mom! They’re nice.
PAPA: Son, we’ve told you not to talk to strangers.
BABY: But I’m not! It’s Goldilocks.
MAMA: I don’t think that’s Goldilocks, Baby Bear.
PAPA: I agree, who are those other girls with her anyway? How do we know they’re not plotting something against us?
MAMA: Stealing our honey!
PAPA: Breaking our chairs!
MAMA: Eating our porridge!
PAPA: Sleeping in our beds!
CINDERELLA: Uh, you know we’re right here, right?
PAPA: I’d say we’d better go, wouldn’t you Mama?
MAMA: Indeed. Let’s shove off, Baby.
PAPA and MAMA escort BABY back the way they came. BABY turns back and waves.
BABY: Bye!
The PRINCESSES seem almost paralyzed.
AURORA: That was…strange.
SNOW WHITE: Yeah, I’ve never actually seen bears who were afraid of humans.
CINDERELLA: Me either.
CINDERELLA/AURORA/SNOW WHITE: realization of what just happened. Oh my gosh! Bears! Talking bears! Holy cow!
CINDERELLA: What is going on here!?
SNOW WHITE: starting to panic. We just saw talking bears!
CINDERELLA: What do we do???
SNOW WHITE: What other dangerously lethal killers are in this forest?!
CINDERELLA: Probably a lot!
AURORA: Okay! Calm down. They walked away from us. They were afraid of us.
SNOW WHITE: Right, it’s okay. We’re okay.
BABY: runs back to the Princesses. If you ever want to play, you can come to my house anytime. You go past the great oak tree, take a left at crocodile pond, up Jack and Jill’s hill, turn right into the forest, don’t fall into any pits ok? and my house is on the other side of the forest.
PAPA/MAMA: offstage. Baby!
BABY: Coming! Bye!
The Princesses are petrified.
SNOW WHITE: Okay, let’s just go sit down.
AURORA: Yeah, sit down.
Beat
CINDERELLA: This is ridiculous.
The menacing howl of a wolf is heard off stage. The Princesses’ hearts stop, then in a frenzy, they run off stage right.
During the scene change, the BEARS, the PRINCESSES and LITTLE RED and GRETEL all run cautiously on stage at different times.
SCENE III
Princesses reenter from stage right, still running frantically from the wolf, and literally run into LITTLE RED and GRETEL, both of whom were running away from the wolf as well. LITTLE RED and GRETEL end up on the floor and look up at CINDERELLA.
LITTLE RED: Cinderella?
CINDERELLA: Uh, it’s Cindy.
LITTLE RED: standing up Sure, whatever. My name is Red.
AURORA: Hands on hips. As in Little Red Riding Hood?
LITTLE RED: Uh, yeah. This is Gretel.
GRETEL: Pleasure. Sticks out a candy covered hand.
AURORA: Hmm.
Wolf howls again off stage. SNOW WHITE and AURORA huddle around CINDERELLA
CINDERELLA: Tell me we’re not the only ones hearing that.
GRETEL: Oh we’re hearing it alright.
LITTLE RED: The woods have been really dangerous lately.
AURORA: Like, what?
LITTLE RED: Creatures go missing all the time, the wolf goes hunting at night, I mean, just last week my grandmother got eaten by that very same wolf and she had to undergo major surgery.
Starts to cry, Gretel tries to comfort her.
GRETEL: It’s been a tough week for her.
SNOW WHITE: Oh my gosh, kneels down my LITTLE RED, I’m so sorry. Is she going to be ok?
LITTLE RED: wipes at nose. Yeah. Barely, if she had been in there a moment longer, she would have started to be…digested! Sobs.
CINDERELLA: disgusted. Oh my.
SNOW WHITE: shoots Cinderella a look. Seeing Little Red’s basket…Are these for her?
LITTLE RED: What? Oh, uh huh. I take her goodies every Tuesday and Friday nights.
GRETEL: Speaking of which, we’d better get going before it gets dark. Things get really scary in these woods at night. Pull yourself together, Red. Come on.
GRETEL and LITTLE RED gather their things and their composer and walk away.
LITTLE RED: Good bye princesses.
GRETEL: Nice to meet you.
They exit.
SNOW WHITE: Princesses?
CINDERELLA: Yeah, did you hear her call me Cinderella? I mean, I know I’m beautiful, but I’m a real person. Gosh.
Beat
AURORA: So what do we do?
Beat of uncertainty. The wolf howls. The Princesses shiver.
SNOW WHITE: I don’t know.
CINDERELLA: taking charge. This is ridiculous. Come on. Walks to a nearby tree. Let’s just sit down and think through this.
Princesses sit down, huddled next to tree on stage right. CINDERELLA in middle, AURORA on her right, SNOW WHITE on her left. AURORA yawns.
AURORA: Hey, if I take a nap, you’ll make sure I’m alright, right?
CINDERELLA: scoffs. Pulls out a lip stick from pocket and starts to apply. You’re such a baby. Yeah, fine. Go to sleep.
AURORA: sleepily. You are so rude. Settles into a restless nap.
From stage left, a Fairy darts nimbly into the forest and stops startled when she sees the Princesses. She cautiously floats closer and examines the Princesses closely. Her eyes widen in recognition and she runs off. She reenters with PETER PAN and the TINKERBELL. They quietly gawk at the Princesses.
SNOW WHITE: Pulls out cell phone and begins to tinker with it. No service. Well, this thing is useless. Throws it, unknowingly, in the FAIRY’s direction.
The Fairy picks up the phone, perplexed. She turns it around then hands it to PETER. She motions to everyone to stay where they are and to remain quiet. She darts gracefully off stage. The cell phone gets handed to PETER PAN. He tucks it away.
SNOW WHITE: Will you make sure I’m okay, too?
CINDERELLA: Rolls her eyes. Oh my gosh, Sara. Yeah.
SNOW WHITE joins AURORA in sleep. Both princesses head drift to CINDERELLA’s shoulders. CINDERELLA humphs, but slowly starts to lose consciousness and drifts to sleep.
From stage left, the FAIRY reenters followed by three, old blind MICE. They each wear sunglasses and carry a white cane. Each mouse is dressed in plain gray pant and shirt, yet has many eccentric accessories (e.g., scarves, headbands, jewelry, etc.) that clash in style and color.
The MICE stop center stage and PETER, TINKERBELL run to greet them. They seem to be having a conversation – but we can’t hear it. The MICE motion everyone off stage. They cautiously sniff the air. As the MICE shuffle forward, we see PINOCCHIO enter from one side of the stage and follow PETER, TINKERBELL and the FAIRY off the other side stage. The MICE’s canes awkwardly bump back and forth until they bump upon the PRINCESSES.
The PRINCESSES are instantly awakened and scream at the sight of the MICE. The MICE are startled by the sudden screaming and begin to scream as well.
The PRINCESSES stare at the MICE.
AURORA: What. The. Heck?!
VIRGINIA: What did you call me???
APRICOT: Virginia, relax. Hello, my name is Apricot. This is Virginia and Lily.
LILY: Hello sweet girls.
VIRGINIA: How do you do? Holds out hand for a handshake, but in the wrong direction.
The PRINCESSES look at each other and elbow one another to receive the handshake. SNOW WHITE finally stands up and gives a three-fingered handshake.
SNOW WHITE: Hesitantly Hi, my name is Sar-
VIRGINIA: Oh we know your names! Snow White, Aurora, and Cinderella.
CINDERELLA: Ugh, not this again. Turns away.
LILY: sensing their disbelief Would you ladies care to join us this evening? It gets particularly dark and cold at night out in the open like this.
SNOW WHITE: That would be –
CINDERELLA: Pulls SNOW WHITE and AURORA into a huddle. Wait a second. We don’t even know who these weirdos are. They look disgusting and smell horrible.
AURORA: They do kind of smell like stinky cheese, don’t they?
SNOW WHITE: I don’t know; they’re kind of endearing.
CINDERELLA: But just look at them! How can we trust someone who looks like that???
Pause. The PRINCESSES look over at the MICE who are doing something strange.
SNOW WHITE: Okay, that is weird.
AURORA: Well, what other choice do we have? If they turn out to be as horrible as they really do look, we can just run away. Besides, they are blind. They laugh.
CINDERELLA: laughing That is true. Turning back to the MICE. Why should we trust you anyway??
VIRGINIA: Well, that quote unquote Wolf is on the loose and I wouldn’t want to be caught within a million miles of him.
APRICOT: You need somewhere safe to stay and we can offer it.
LILY: Please, trust us.
CINDERELLA: huffs. Fine, lead the way.
The MICE start to walk in weird patterns on the stage, the Princesses dutifully and silently following behind. After a while…
CINDERELLA: Do you even know where you’re going?
VIRGINIA: No. We’re blind
APRICOT: We use our noses.
Excessive sniffing. They catch a scent and rush off stage. The girls hesitate, look at each other nervously and follow the mice off of stage right.
SCENE IV
ENTER the EVIL QUEEN’S lair. Upstage right is a jail cell where we see the silhouette of a man. Center stage is a glorious throne where the EVIL QUEEN in all of her evil glory, sits.
PINOCCHIO: enters hesitantly from stage left, carrying a rope that leads off stage. He is clearly frightened of the QUEEN. Clears throat. Nothing. Your majesty?
QUEEN: quickly, yet gracefully stands up. She wears a sweeping purple dress with a majestic crown a top her head. Her face is severe and unkind. Ah, Pinocchio darling. You’ve returned at last. She peers anxiously over his shoulder. Beat. Where are they, Pinocchio?
PINOCCHIO: Well, uh, I didn’t get everyone that you waned, but I got Tinkerbell! He yanks on the rope and TINKERBELL stumbles on stage.
QUEEN: indifferent Hmm. Peter let her go so easily?
PINOCCHIO: Well, she got separated from the group, so it was easy to catch her.
QUEEN: Hmm. Put her in the cell.
PINOCCHIO drags her to the jail cell, cautiously opens the door and shoves her in. He turns to face the QUEEN. Awkward silence.
QUEEN: Where are the others, Pinocchio?
PINOCCHIO: Well, uh, you see, it’s kind of a funny story. You see, I used your special magic and pushed them through the mirror, just like we planned. But as soon as we got here, 47 ninjas came outta nowhere and they tied me up to this really pokey bean stalk and – noes grows twice its size.
QUEEN: losing patience. Pinocchio, you had one job. One microscopic job, Pinocchio. And. You. FAILED! Pacing furiously. I should have known that you wouldn’t accomplish the task. How could I have been so foolish as to trust you! You never complete any charge that I give you. You are lazy and insufficient to my needs.
PINOCCHIO: hurt. Hey, just because I’m not a real boy, doesn’t mean that I don’t have real feelings. Wipes at runny nose. Why do you need those girls so bad anyway?
QUEEN: savagely. They’re not simply girls, Pinocchio. They are princesses; sent away many moons ago for “safe keeping.” Those princesses stand in my way to becoming all-powerful. They stand in the way of my marriage to Prince Charming. Walks towards the jail cell-upstage right.
PRINCE CHARMING: In your dreams, you old hag.
QUEEN: Laughs kindly. Oh Charming, Charming, Charming. Life would be so much more exquisite for you if you accepted my generous offer. Untold wealth, all the power you could imagine, and of course, me.
CHARMING: I would rather rot in this cell.
QUEEN: Fortunately for you, that can be arranged. Turns back to Pinocchio. The other princesses fell easily to my plot; vanity and selfishness encroached quickly upon their hearts, kindness never to be found again. But these three, they are far more difficult. They are close to becoming rotten, on the brink of becoming useless to mankind, but they take too long. And I do not have time to spare, Pinocchio. If any inkling of good remains in those Princesses, I won’t succeed. That is why I assigned you to bring them to me. They are not becoming rotten fast enough on their own. They need my…help.
The BIG BAD WOLF enters lazily. He has a satchel draped across his shoulder.
WOLF: Hello.
QUEEN: relieved. Ah, it is you. Rushes to him. Tell me you know of their whereabouts. Pointedly to Pinocchio. Somebody lost them.
WOLF: Unfortunately your royal highness, I lost their scent-
QUEEN: yells incoherently.
WOLF: But they are here, your majesty. All three of ‘em.
QUEEN: Pause, calming down. Bring him to me.
WOLF: Him?
QUEEN: Yes, him! He is the only one competent to handle a task of such vital importance. You! Whips to Pinocchio. Go, get, him and bring him to me. You failed me once Pinocchio, do not fail me again. Your life may depend on it. Go!
PINOCCHIO rushes awkwardly off stage left.
QUEEN paces, then finally sits at her throne.
WOLF: lazily, pulling a piece of food out of his satchel and eating it. So, you’re pulling out the big guns. I’m not good enough for you anymore, huh?
QUEEN: He is the only one conniving enough to do as I demand!
WOLF: The only way he’ll work for you is if you make a deal.
QUEEN: I know that!
Pause
WOLF: What-cha gonna offer him?
QUEEN: Whatever he demands.
WOLF: That could be a pretty high price, your highness.
QUEEN: Do not use that tone with me! And yes it will. But I haven’t an alternative choice; I send Pinocchio, he fails. I send you, you fail. He will not fail.
Enter Pinocchio with a hooded man.
PINOCCHIO: Uh, your majesty, we have returned. He bows deeply.
QUEEN: Ah, at last. Leave us.
WOLF and PINOCCHIO exit.
RUMPELSTILKSTIN: I hear you have a job for me.
QUEEN: Indeed I do. Surely you’ve heard of the…unrest in the forest.
RUMPELSTILKSTIN: Yes…
QUEEN: The three princesses have returned.
RUMPELSTILKSTIN: So I’ve gathered.
QUEEN: And with their return comes my downfall, IF they succeed.
RUMPELSTILKSTIN: I am well aware of the consequences. Pardon my saying so your majesty, but, get to the point.
QUEEN: I need you to stop them at all costs. Traps, distractions, anything! They cannot reach me. They must turn against each other if I am to reign. Any inkling of good they may have left in them needs be destroyed. Do you understand?
RUMPEL: Of course I do.
QUEEN: Can you accomplish this imperative task?
REUMPEL: You know I can. If I may, you know my services come only at a very high price.
The QUEEN acknowledges this.
RUMPEL: What are you willing to trade?
QUEEN: One-fourth of my riches.
RUMPEL: scoffs. Those I don’t need.
QUEEN: A portion of my kingdom.
RUMPEL: Closer.
Beat
QUEEN: Enough with these games, disclose your price.
RUMPEL: I want the mice.
QUEEN: laughs. Why you can’t be serious.
RUMPEL: You have no idea their capabilities.
QUEEN: narrowing her focus. What do you mean “their capabilities”?
RUMPEL: Do you not remember who first sent the princesses away? Do you not realize how much power one would need possess to – stops himself, he realizes he’s giving too much away. That is my price.
QUEEN: suspicious. They are not mine to give.
RUMPEL: But once you become all powerful Queen, everything and everyONE lies in your power. Give me your oath.
QUEEN: You have my solemn word that I shall deliver the mice safely into your hands.
RUMPEL produces a scroll and feather pen from overcoat. He hands the pen to the QUEEN and she signs. He quickly puts it away.
QUEEN: Now, go and do my bidding…..Rumpelstiltskin.
On this final line, Rumpel removes his hood, revealing a crooked and severe face.
Fade to black.
SCENE V
Lights up on the cozy cottage of the three blind MICE. There is a small table with tea on it, a battered couch, books strewn all over a book case and other “homey” items, although nothing matches. APRICOT works on a simple breakfast. LILY sits at the table with a book. VIRGINIA does something very strange on the couch (meditation???).
APRICOT: How did you sleep last night, Lily?
LILY: Oh, it was a restless sleep. And you?
APRICOT: Not too well, I will admit.
VIRGINIA: Are you kidding??? I slept like a log floatin’ down a river of gold.
LILY: So….well then?
VIRIGNIA: Yeah!
LILY: Apricot, I feel quite unsettled.
APRICOT: I know the feeling, Lily. We are about to ask these Princesses to do a very hard thing. I hope they agree.
VIRGINIA: Why wouldn’t they? This is their rightful Kingdom anyway.
APRICOT: But they don’t know that yet. We mustn’t rush them or else we risk losing them forever.
LILY: How do you suggest we handle the situation?
APRICOT: Slowly, we must be slow and gentle in our explanation.
The PRINCESSES enter slowly.
CINDERELLA: Don’t you have a mirror? I can’t fix my hair without one.
VIRGINIA: Good morning to you too.
LILY: Ah, Princesses, how did you sleep?
AURORA: sits down next to VIGINIA. Like a log.
VIRGINIA: Floatin’ down a river of gold?
AURORA: Uh sure.
LILY: turning back to CINDERELLA and SNOW WHITE. And you two?
SNOW WHITE: Oh it was fine.
CINDERELLA: I had a pretty weird dream.
VIRGINIA: A dream???
CINDERELLA: Yes, I was walking in this meadow when all these horribly ugly people popped out of nowhere and were running to me, begging me to help them.
LILY: Oh?
CINDERELLA: They were really ugly though and dressed in rags.
APRICOT: And what did you do?
CINDERELLA: I turned away, obviously.
APRICOT/LILY/VIRGINIA: crestfallen. Oh.
SNOW WHITE: What’s for breakfast?
AURORA: What happened to your “apples only diet?”
SNOW WHITE: Eh, who cares? Besides, whatever Apricot’s cooking looks delicious.
APRICOT: Why don’t you girls sit down, breakfast is ready.
The Princesses sit around a small table as the MICE bring them the food.
LILY: How do you like it here?
SNOW WHITE: Oh, I like it, your house is quite...quaint. It reminds me of my grandma’s house actually. Thinking. Wow, I haven’t been there in a long time.
LILY: I’m sure your grandmother would appreciate a visit from you.
SNOW WHITE: Yeah, she probably would.
AURORA: That is, if we ever get home.
CINDERELLA: Yeah! Where the heck are we?
The MICE appear hesitant.
APRICOT: You have returned home.
CINDERELLA: Home?! No, my home is in Mesquite.
LILY: You used to live here.
VIRGINIA: Darn tooting. You three were the best rulers we ever saw.
AURORA: Wait, rulers?
APRICOT: In our land, we had many rulers, many Queens and Kings. The three of you were each being prepared to rule a section of the kingdom. Snow White, the animals of the Kingdom; Aurora, the peasants of the Kingdom; and Cinderella, the dignitaries of the Kingdom. But there was one among you who was corrupt, who wanted the power for herself. We call her, The Evil Queen.
CINDERELLA: The Evil Queen? You have got to be–
SNOW WHITE: Shh!
APRICOT: She waged a war on our land. But not by bloodshed. She waged a different kind of war.
LILY: A war on mankind. On the human condition.
APRICOT: Sister turned against sister. Families were torn apart. Vanity and pride encroached upon the hearts of the creatures of the Kingdom. The Queens knew they had to fight the evil that plagued the land, but we felt a deep sinking and despair, we knew they would not succeed. So we sent the three of you away. For…safe keeping.
SNOW WHITE: Safe keeping?
AURORA: What do you mean?
APRICOT: We had hoped that you would be safe in the human world. Away from the cruelty, the disregard of compassion and kindness. But we were wrong. The human world is filled with vanity, selfishness and cruelty.
SNOW WHITE: Wait, do you have magical powers, or something?
LILY: We used to, but as the Queen has grown in her power, ours diminishes. It is no longer there.
APRICOT: So, like the Queens before you, you too, began to go “rotten.”
SNOW WHITE: Rotten? What does that mean?
VIRGINIA: It means you turned rude, vain and unkind, kid.
LILY: However, the Evil Queen didn’t like how long it was taking for you to become rotten.
SNOW WHITE: So she brought us here?
VIRGINIA: Exactly toots!
APRICOT: Only when all the Princesses are rotten, can she have complete rule over the Kingdom.
Beat.
APRICOT: She brought you here to sabotage you. To “finish you off”. Then she will become our ruler forever.
CINDERELLA: laughs. This is absolutely ridiculous.
SNOW WHITE: I don’t know…it sort of makes sense.
AURORA: indifferent. I guess I can see it.
APRICOT: to Cinderella. As ridiculous as this may seem to you, Princess, all the good is leaving our world. And the only way you can get home to your precious make up and cell phone service is if you defeat the Evil Queen. If you don’t, you stay here forever oozing with vanity, selfishness and disregard for others’ feelings!
VIRGINIA: As if she doesn’t ooze with that already.
CINDERELLA: Hey! You listen here, Ugly. I didn’t ask to come to this freak land. I didn’t ask to be stuck with two of the most annoying girls in school. I didn’t ask to sit around in this messy house listening to three old crazy ladies carry on and on. All I want is to get back to my life and out of yours.
Beat.
VIRGINIA is stunned and hurt. LILY puts an arm around her.
Beat.
APRICOT: The only way you can get home is if you defeat the Evil Queen. When you’re ready to accept that and speak kindly to my friends, you may come back. Until then, please leave. She motions to the door.
CINDERELLA: Gladly! She stalks to the door. Stops, turns around. To AURORA and SNOW WHITE Aren’t you coming?
Beat
SNOW WHITE: shakes her head sadly.
AURORA: I don’t want to “annoy” you.
CINDERELLA exits dramatically, leaving the MICE, AURORA and SNOW WHITE, baffled on stage.
VIRGINIA: That went well.
APRICOT: She’ll come around. Beat. Alright you two, let’s get to work.
Blackout.
SCENE VI
The THREE BEARS sit contentedly outside their cottage on their porch.
PAPA: It is a beautiful day today, isn’t it Mama?
MAMA: It surely is, Papa.
PAPA: The porridge was especially delicious this morning.
MAMA: I’m glad you liked it.
PAPA: Baby, do you have any friends coming over today to play?
BABY: Well, I wanted to play with Squirrel today, but he had to clean his room.
MAMA: Maybe you should be doing the same thing, Baby.
BABY: But I’m busy.
MAMA: laughs Okay, ten more minutes and then you need to start on your own room.
RUMPELSTILTSKIN and the WOLF walk down the path towards the bears. PAPA spots them.
PAPA: Uh, Mama, maybe she should go inside now.
MAMA: And why’s that, Papa?
PAPA: We have visitors.
MAMA: seeing who he’s referring to, she gets nervous. Oh dear. Baby, please go inside.
RUMPEL and the WOLF make it to the porch.
RUMPEL: Don’t make her leave on our account. In fact, she might be able to help us.
PAPA: Rumpel. Wolf.
WOLF: Mr. Bear.
PAPA: What do you need Rumpel?
RUMPEL: Oh, we just wanted to stop by and see how you have been getting along, courtesy of the Queen.
PAPA: Hm.
MAMA: We’ve been doing quite well, thank you.
WOLF: How nice.
BABY sneezes.
RUMPEL: Bless you. Now dear Baby Bear, my you are growing up. How old are you now?
BABY: Seven.
RUMPEL: Seven years old?! You must have lots of friends in the forest.
BABY: Yeah, I do
PAPA: As you can see Rumpel, we are just fine. Thanks for dropping in.
RUMPEL: I do have one question.
PAPA: Of course you do.
WOLF: Menacingly Watch it.
RUMPEL: I’m looking for a good friend of mine.
MAMA: Oh?
RUMPE: Yes. I am, in fact, looking for three young ladies. To BABY, you haven’t seen them, have you?
BABY: Well I did see some girls who looked like Goldilocks.
RUMPEL: Oh, you did now, did you? Where did you see them?
BABY: Down past the –
PAPA: I don’t think that’s right, Baby. We don’t really remember where we saw them.
RUMPEL: Well, you’ll remember, and when you do, you’d better tell me. Isn’t that right, Wolf?
WOLF: You’d better believe it.
PAPA: Why do you care about three young girls?
RUMPEL: Well, the Queen and I were throwing a party and wanted to invite them.
BABY: Oh a party!
RUMPEL: Yes! And if you tell us anything you know about the girls, we will invite you too.
PAPA: Well, we don’t remember anything. So you can be on your way.
RUMPEL: We’ll be back, Bear. Don’t think you can evade us forever.
WOLF: Bye
They leave.
MAMA: Papa, what was that about?
PAPA: I’m not sure, Mama. But I don’t feel good about it.
MAMA: There was certainly a strange feeling, wasn’t there?
PAPA: Baby, I don’t want you leaving the yard alone.
BABY: But Papa-
PAPA: As long as Rumpel and the Wolf are out and about, we need you here.
BABY: Yes, Papa.
SCENE VII
Cinderella is wandering the forest and sees a boy in green clothing searching out to the audience.
CINDERELLA: You should not be wearing green pants with a green shirt and a green hat. It doesn’t work.
PETER: Huh?
CINDERELLA: Your clothes, they clash.
PETER: Oh, whatever. Considers her for a moment. Hey, you wouldn’t happen to know which way is South, would you?
CINDERELLA: Of course I would, it’s that way. Points.
PETER: Thanks. He starts to leave.
CINDERELLA: Hey, hang on a second. What’s your name?
PETER: Peter Pan!
CINDERELLA: Of course it is.
PETER: What’s yours?
CINDERELLA: It’s Cindy.
PETER: Is that short for Cinderella?
CINDERELLA: exasperated. Sure.
PETER: Wow, I’ve only heard stories about you. Wendy’s told me all about you.
CINDERELLA: Wendy?
PETER: Yeah, she’s my mother.
CINDERELLA: Wonderful.
PETER: Hey, if what she said was true, you really shouldn’t be out here alone.
CINDERELLA: And why is that? I’m just trying to get out of this dang forest.
PETER: Well, first of all, you can’t just “get out” of this forest, the only way you can get out is by defeating the Evil Queen.
CINDERELLA: Yup, I’ve heard that one before.
PETER: Second, I’ve heard that Rumpelstiltskin and the Wolf are hunting you down.
CINDERELLA: They’re…what?
PETER: Hunting you down! You know- hi yah! Uh! Whamp! Bam! Each sound is accompanied by a karate move.
CINDERELLA: Okay…
PETER: Seriously, your majesty. If they find you, you’re dead meat.
Wolf howl.
PETER: Well, see ya!
CINDERELLA: Wait a second! Uh…could I, maybe, just for a minute, come with you? The idea of being hunted down doesn’t exactly appeal to me.
PETER: Yeah, sure, whatever. But I can’t take you to Neverland because you can’t fly and I can’t find Tink.
CINDERELLA: Yeah, yeah, just get me out of here.
PETER: Okay, let’s go.
They rush off stage as RUMPEL and the WOLF enter, out of breath.
RUMPEL: Uhhh!!! We’re too late! After them!
WOLF: trying to catch his breath. Give, me, a, minute.
RUMPEL: This isn’t working! We need to regroup. Obviously you aren’t as good of tracker as you said you were. I need to employ different strategies. He starts to exit the same way he came on.
WOLF: Hey, wait up.
RUMPEL: turns around sharply. I am through waiting for you. If you want the Queen to spare your life, keep up.
They dash off stage.
SCENE VIII
Outside the MICE’s cottage. AURORA and SNOW WHITE have packs on their backs and are saying goodbye to the mice.
SNOW WHITE: Thank you for everything, Apricot. They embrace. You, Virginia and Lily have been so kind to us.
APRICOT: It was our pleasure.
VIRGINIA: Just don’t get squashed out there, okay?
AURORA: Sure…
LILY: You’ll do great. Just remember what we taught you.
APRICOT: You have the map?
SNOW WHITE: In my bag.
LILY: You have warm clothing?
SNOW WHITE: Also in my bag.
VIRGINIA: Ya got cookies?
AURORA: In MY bag!
Virginia initiates a high five.
APRICOT: Good luck out there. As soon as you find her, go straight to the Queen. Time is slipping away.
SNOW WHITE: smiles kindly. Goodbye. They start to walk away.
VIRGINIA: Smell you later!
AURORA: good-naturedly. That’s yourself you’re smelling, Virginia! The PRINCESSES exit.
VIRGINIA: smells her armpit. Oh sweet Neptune. She’s right.
SCENE IX
AURORA and SNOW WHITE have traveled many hours in the forest and are weary. The enter from stage right and are wearing down. Their previously cheerful attitudes begin to wear off.
AURORA: I’m starting to get really tired, Sara.
SNOW WHITE: So am I, Rose!
The trek on.
AURORA: Could we stop somewhere?
SNOW WHITE: Where exactly would you like to stop? We’re in the middle of nowhere.
AURORA: Well – I guess you’re right. Let’s keep going. Beat. Do you think we’ll ever find Cindy? She was pretty upset when she left.
SNOW WHITE: I know.
AURORA: Honestly, I’m still kind of man at her. She called us annoying. Why would she be friends with us if she thought we were annoying?
SNOW WHITE: Shrugs. I guess when people are upset, they can say some mean things. Maybe that’s all it was. But I’m with you, she kind of hurt my feelings.
AURORA: Mine too.
SNOW WHITE: But I am sort of worried about her. She’s out wandering alone somewhere and she has no idea what’s going on.
AURORA: An Evil Queen hunting us down, you mean?
SNOW WHITE: laughs dryly. Yeah.
AURORA: Sometimes, if I think about it too long, I start to doubt it. Like, this whole thing is just some ridiculous made up thing.
SNOW WHITE: It does seem pretty crazy and weird, huh?
AURORA nods.
SNOW WHITE: Well, don’t think about it too hard then. Let’s just get this done and then we can go home. It seems like the only way.
AURORA nods again. They begin to trek onward again, but GRETEL and LITTLE RED enter from stage right, moaning and holding their stomachs.
SNOW WHITE: Gretel! Red! Are you two alright?
RED: Oh, Snow White!
GRETEL: No, I have a horrible stomach ache and I think I may puke.
RED: Me too.
AURORA: Ew.
SNOW WHITE: Do you have the stomach flu or something?
GRETEL: No, I just ate too much candy. This usually happens once a week or so.
RED: This doesn’t happen to me very often since my mom makes me eat whole wheat bread and muffins.
GRETEL: Those muffins are disgusting, Red, full of oats and stuff.
RED: Well your teeth are going to rot out of your head someday, Gretel.
GRETEL: Yeah, yeah.
AURORA: Well, we wish we could help, but we got to get going.
SNOW WHITE: Rose, come on. They clearly need some help; a drink of water or something. Taking GRETEL’s other side. There’s got to be a well around here somewhere
AURORA: Whoa, hang on a second Sara. We need to get going.
SNOW WHITE: Rose, this will only take a second and they obviously need help.
AURORA: Someone else can give it. We need to defeat the Queen together.
SNOW WHITE: If I don’t help them, who will?
AURORA: Well, what the heck am I supposed to do?
SNOW WHITE: You could come along?
AURORA: No thanks.
SNOW WHITE: Okay, fine. You keep looking for Cindy and meet me back here in an hour.
AURORA: Fine.
SNOW WHITE: Okay, a well, a river, anything. Lead the way. They begin to exit. Bye Rose, be careful out there.
AURORA: See you soon!
SNOW WHTE, GRETEL and RED exit. AURORA is left center stage.
AURORA: Well, this is great. Alright Cindy. You’d better not be far. Begins to walk off-stage, but hesitates. You know, a little nap probably wouldn’t hurt any. Besides, it’s probably getting close to bedtime anyway, right? Sure. Crosses center stage to some soft looking grass that has a canopy of leaves above it. Oh yeah, that looks nice. Begins to settle in. Ah yeah, this is the life. Drifts to sleep.
Several beats of stillness. Then, PETER PAN runs on frantically from stage left, but the WOLF runs from stage right and RUMPELSTILTSKIN runs on behind PETER PAN, trapping him.
WOLF: Where did she go?! He lunges at PETER.
PETER: dodges the WOLF. I don’t know! She saw you coming and ran off!
WOLF: You lie!!! He lunges again.
AURORA awakes. Alarmed and frightening by what she sees, she hides deeper into her napping place.
PETER dodges the WOLF once again.
RUMPEL: Stop! He lifts his hand to the WOLF. Peter Pan is a foolish boy. But surely he knows where Cinderella is. He has heard the stories. But, perhaps, if he won’t tell us, he will tell The Queen.
PETER: backs away. Oh, no, no, no. Not her.
RUMPEL: Oh yes.
RUMPEL and the WOLF lunge one final time and catch PETER. RUMPEL and the WOLF have their back to her, so they don’t see AURORA peeking over the leaves. But PETER does.
RUMPEL: menacingly. I’ll give you one final time to tell us where she went.
PETER looks to AURORA, her eyes wide. With final resolve, he shouts “NEVER!”
RUMPEL: Very well. RUMPEL and the WOLF drag him off.
AURORA is shocked by what she has seen. After a moment, she cautiously comes from her hiding place.
AURORA: Cindy! She must be nearby!
Suddenly, from upstage, we see the beautiful FAIRY dance towards us. She moves fluidly and gracefully. It’s as if the world holds its breath and time stands still when the FAIRY moves. Slowly, yet with purpose, she moves towards AURORA. AURORA doesn’t seem at all frightened, in fact, she seems to be in a trance, watching the beautiful creature dance towards her.
AURORA: Who are you?
The FAIRY says nothing, yet moves in a way that AURORA seems to recognize.
AURORA: You’re the Fairy. With new realization You’re the Fairy!!! Oh my gosh! She runs to her and the two embrace. You know where she is, don’t you?
The FAIRY smiles knowingly and softly nods her head.
AURORA: Can you take me to her?!
She turns in a beautiful pirouette and motions for AURORA to follow her.
AURORA: Yes, yes! I’ll follow.
The Fairy flits off stage right with AURORA on her heels calling after her “Thank you, thank you!”
SCENE X
The THREE BLIND MICE’s cottage. The three MICE busy themselves with household work. PINOCCHIO knocks on the door.
LILY: opens the door and is surprised at what she sees. Pinocchio!
PINOCCHIO: Hello. May I come in?
LILY: Of course, of course. Is everything alright?
PINOCCHIO: I was hoping I could talk to the three of you.
APRICOT: What happens to be the problem?
PINOCCHIO: The Evil Queen is the problem.
VIRIGNIA: Ha! That’s an understatement.
LILY: What seems to be on your mind?
PINOCCHIO: I can’t do it anymore.
VIRGINIA: Can’t do what?
PINOCCHIO: The Evil Queen. She promised me all sorts of wealth and power if I helped her and I don’t have any of those things. Besides, I’m just not happy anymore. She treats me like dirt.
APRICOT: She can be truly cruel, can’t she?
PINOCCHIO: Uh huh. And she calls me names and threatens me. Plus, she holds random creatures hostage. Like, the Prince. She’s had him there for who knows how long, she’s has Tinkerbell locked up and I heard that Peter Pan got captured too.
LILY: My, my, my.
PINOCCHIO: I don’t want to serve her anymore, but I need help.
VIRGINA: Hold on a second, how do we know you’re not a spy.
APRICOT: Virginia, please. This is Pinocchio, after all.
VIRGINIA: Oh. Sorry.
APRICOT: Pinocchio, you are brave coming here, as I’m sure the Queen has all sorts of spies out, but you don’t need our help. You can decide for yourself who you will and will not serve.
LILY: That’s right. You are in charge of your own happiness.
PINOCCHIO: And I want to be! That’s why I want to help you!
VIRGINIA: Us?
PINOCCHIO: Yes, the war against the Evil Queen needs to come to an end and I want to help. I want to be on the right side for once. The way the Evil Queen treats people……no one deserves that.
LILY: You’re right Pinocchio. Kindness is always better than cruelty.
PINOCCHIO: What can I do?
VIRGINIA: Cinderella!
APRICOT: She’s lost. Find her. Take her to the Queen.
PINOCCHIO: What?! Are you crazy!?
APRICOT: Snow White and Aurora are making their way to her fortress right now. They’ll need Cinderella’s help if they want to defeat the Queen.
PINOCCHIO: What if she doesn’t listen to me?
LILY: Just be honest and kind. That’s all we can ask of you.
PINOCCHIO: Okay, I think I can do that.
LILY: You can.
PINOCCHIO: Thanks! I’ll go find her right now! He leaves.
APRICOT: That was surprising.
LILY: I had always hoped he’d come around.
SCENE XI
CINDERELLA stumbles on from stage right, she has twigs in her hair and a disheveled appearance. Unknown to her, PINOCCHIO follows behind.
CINDERELLA: mumbling to herself. I hate trees. She begins to pick off the twigs and other flora and fauna. I hate bushes. I hate plants. I hate this forest. She rummages in her pocket for a pocket mirror. She finds one and begins fixing her appearance. She adlibs about how awful she looks and feels.
PINOCCHIO: You know what would fix that?
CINDERELLA: visibly jumps. Holy cow! Sheesh, don’t scare me like that.
PINOCCHIO: Sorry.
CINDERELLA: Were you following me?
PINOCCHIO: Pause. Uh huh.
CINDERELLA: Get away from me.
PINOCCHIO: Wait! Please listen! You have to defeat the Queen! I know what terrible things she is capable of, trust me. But I can lead you to her!
CINDERELLA: Why would I want to do that? What’s your name anyway?
PINOCCHIO: I’m Pinocchio. Listen, Cinderella, your friends are headed there right now to try and defeat her on their own. But they need you. This is the only way for things to go back to normal.
CINDERELLA: I don’t really care. Beat. But, I do really wanna get out of here. And if that means I have to defeat some Evil Queen, okay, whatever. Just give me a minute to fix my hair. She distances herself from PINOCCHIO and sits down hopelessly, her hair forgotten.
From stage right, enters a frantic PAPA BEAR, he sees CINDERELLA and runs to her.
PAPA: Oh Goldilocks!
CINDERELLA: It’s Cindy.
PAPA: Stops dead in his tracks. Cinderella? Pardon me. He gives a slight bow. Do you think you could help us? Poor Baby got caught in a trap and I just can’t get her out. My paws are too big! We need someone with small hands.
CINDERELLA: dryly Ask him. Motioning to PINOCCHIO.
PINOCCHIO: Hey, I don’t do blood.
CINDERELLA: Okay, where is she?
PAPA: I’ll go get her, Mama is sitting with her! He runs back on stage right and reenters with MAMA, both are carrying BABY BEAR. BABY has a trap ensnared around her leg and her face is tear stricken.
BABY: whimpering. This really hurts, Mama.
MAMA: I know sweetheart. You’re being so brave. Cinderella here will help you.
CINDERELLA comes closer to view BABY BEAR and is horrified at what she sees.
CINDERELLA: Oh my gosh. When did this happen? She gingerly touches the trap.
PAPA: Twenty minutes ago, I’d say. Wouldn’t you, Mama?
MAMA: Yes, 20 minutes sounds right.
CINDERELLA: What were you doing? Where was this?
PAPA: Out about ½ mile from the Dwarves’ cottage.
MAMA: We were out on a picnic. This kind of thing has never happened before.
PAPA: Never even heard of something like this happening before.
MAMA: Can you get it off?
CINDERELLA: I’ll try. This looks pretty bad. Poor Baby, how are your toes?
BABY: They hurt.
CINDERELLA: Good, that means there’s still some blood flow. Examining the trap. Wow, this is a pretty intricate snare. I mean, I don’t hunt things, obviously she tosses her hair, but look at this detail. She motions MAMA and PAPA closer. There’s writing on it, do you see?
PAPA: “EQ will reign forever.”
CINDERELLA: EQ?
PINOCCHIO: The Evil Queen.
CINDERELLA: Oh.
MAMA: Never mind the writing. Please get this off, Cinderella.
CINDERELLA: I guess I’ll try.
She fumbles around with the chains and snare. BABY BEAR continues to whimper softly, trying to be brave. MAMA sits next to her, comforting her.
CINDERELLA: Ouch! She pulls out her hand and shakes it off. That thing is sharp.
BABY: Don’t I know it!
CINDERELLA: I’m sorry, Baby. She studies it a moment longer. Okay, I think I figured it out. Hold your breath. She gives a swift and forceful pull. The trap comes off as BABY inhales sharply. CINDERELLA looks closely at the trap, then throws it several feet away. Ew. That thing was nasty. She turns her attention to BABY BEAR who is still in shock and holding on to MAMA fiercely. Are you okay, Baby?
BABY nods shakily.
CINDERELLA: looks closer at the wounds. That’s gonna need some bandage or some Neosporin or something. You don’t have any?
MAMA: No, none at all.
CINDERELLA: Pinocchio? Sighs, reaches into her pocket. This chapstick is my favorite. It’s has mango butter, vitamins e and a, coconut oil, and beeswax. It’s the most moisturizing chapstick that I’ve ever owned. She looks at it longingly, then hands it to BABY. Here. It will have to do till you can get some stitches or Neosporin or whatever.
BABY: Thank you.
MAMA: Yes, thank you Cinderella. You saved our Baby.
CINDERELLA: Yeah, yeah.
MAMA and PAPA hug BABY whispering softly, making sure that BABY is okay. CINDERELLA looks on longingly. Is she missing her friends?
CINDERELLA: Well, take me to the Evil Queen.
Suddenly from stage left, AURORA pops out of nowhere, she is followed by the FAIRY.
AURORA: Not without me, you don’t!
CINDERELLA and AURORA regard each other for a moment, then AURORA runs into CINDERELLA’S arms.
AURORA: I’m glad you’re okay, Cindy. Really. Sara and I were pretty worried.
CINDERELLA: overcome by her friend’s sincerity. Yeah, so was I. Where is she anyway?
AURORA: She’s helping Gretel and Little Red, they were pretty sick. And I promised to meet her. Come on! She takes CINDERELLA’s hand and starts to drag her off stage.
CINDERELLA: Wait! She runs to the THREE BEARS. Bye, Baby. Bye Mama. Bye Papa.
MAMA: Thank you so much, CINDERELLA.
Pause
CINDERELLA: Thanks. She smiles softly and runs back to AURORA. Okay, come Pinocchio. Let’s go.
SCENE XII
The Evil Queen’s lair. She sits on her throne as RUMPEL and the WOLF drag Peter Pan in. She laughs in delight.
QUEEN: Ah, the famous Peter Pan.
PETER gets thrown at her feet.
QUEEN: Aren’t you a little lost?
PETER: He spots TINK in the jail cell and tries to run to her. Tink!!!
The WOLF stops him in his tracks.
QUEEN: Come, come Peter. We must have a little chat. I know you know where they are.
PETER: I don’t.
QUEEN: Don’t you? I have sources that tell me that you were seen traipsing through the forest with Cinderella.
At her name, the PRINCE jumps and listens intently.
QUEEN: Tell me where she is.
PETER: I don’t know where she is.
QUEEN: You lie!
PETER: I don’t! She saw your two henchmen over there and ran off. She’s not an idiot!
QUEEN: Unlike you.
PETER: Insult me if it makes you feel better, but I’m not talking.
QUEEN: Pity. Lock him away.
The WOLF grabs him and shoves him towards the jail cell in the back.
QUEEN: My, my. My little cell is getting quite crowded, don’t you think? Take him to the dungeons.
TINK: No!!!!!
The QUEEN laughs as PETER is dragged off stage.
PRINCE: You’re disgusting.
QUEEN: Thank you. It’s one of my better qualities.
PRINCE: You’re not going to get away with this.
QUEEN: I already am. She waltzes off with RUMPEL at her heels.
PRINCE: I’m sorry, Tink. You risked so much by allowing yourself to be captured. And now it appears to have been for nothing.
TINK: Not nothing, your highness. We are one step closer to getting our Kingdom back as it was.
PRINCE: How can you say so? More creatures get summoned to the dungeon every hour.
TINK: She’s getting nervous, the Evil Queen. So she locks people away. She thinks that somehow, that gives her more control.
PRINCE: catching on to her train of thought. But it doesn’t! It just means that more people will come to free them.
TINK: Exactly.
Beat
PRINCE: I hope they’re not far, Tink. It’s been so long, will she even remember me?
TINK: Maybe not at first, but I think she will. She is Cinderella, after all. I think it will just take time.
PRINCE: And time is exactly what we’re running out of.
SCENE XIII
A water well is center stage and GRETEL and RED sit next to it, drinking cups of water lazily. SNOW WHITE stands nearby.
GRETEL: moans Oh my stomach. I never thought water would taste so good.
RED: Snow, are you okay?
SNOW WHITE: What? Oh yeah, I’m fine. Hey, I just think I should probably get going. I don’t know how long we wandered out here till we found that well, but I promised Rose that I would get back.
GRETEL: Sure, sure. Go ahead. We’re fine here.
SNOW WHITE: Are you sure? I don’t have to leave yet.
RED: Seriously Snow, we’ll be fine.
GRETEL: Now that I feel like my stomach has finally calmed down again.
SNOW WHITE: You know, you really shouldn’t eat so much candy.
GRETEL: Yeah, I know. But it’s so good!
RED: You need help.
Offstage, we hear the call for PINOCCHIO, CINDERELLA, and AURORA all calling for SNOW WHITE.
PINOCCHIO: Snow White!
CINDERELLA/AURORA: Sara! Where are you?
SNOW WHITE: Oh my gosh! I’m over here!
PINOCCHIO, CINDERELLA, and AURORA run onstage.
SNOW WHITE: Cindy! She runs to her and they embrace.
AURORA: We were worried about you, Sara.
SNOW WHITE: I’m fine, really. But we need to get going. I feel like we’re running out of time.
AURORA: I know, me too. I keep getting this sinking feeling and I’ve never had that before.
SNOW WHITE: Yeah, me either. Let’s go.
CINDERELLA: Hang on. This is hard for her, so she rushes through it. Sara, Rose, I’m sorry for those things that I said back in the Mice’s cottage. I was scared, angry, I don’t know. But I’m sorry.
SNOW WHITE: It’s okay, Cindy. We get it.
AURORA: Yeah, it’s whatever.
Pause.
PINOCCHIO: Hey, can we go now?
CINDERELLA: Oh, yeah, sure. Come on.
They exit off stage right.
RED: Bye, Princesses!
GRETEL: See ya, wouldn’t wanta be ya!
RED: with a pointed look to GRETEL, You need so much help.
GRETEL: Oh come on, I wouldn’t want to defeat the Evil Queen, would you?
RED: she thinks about it for a minute, Nah. Not by myself anyway.
GRETEL: Exactly. Plus, that Rumpelstiltskin gives me the creeps.
RED: Hm, I know what you mean. Sometimes I wonder if-
She’s cut off by VIRGINIA who enters from stage left.
VIRGINIA: I can smell ‘em! I’m so close!
APRICOT and LILY enter behind her.
VIRGINIA: Ah ha! She bumps into GRETEL and LITTLE RED.
GRETEL: Hey!
RED: Come on!
VIRGINIA: You’re not the Princesses!
GRETEL: Nope.
RED: Certainly am not.
APRICOT: Virginia, you need your nose checked.
VIRGINIA: I do not!
LILY: Really?
VIRGINIA: Well, maybe it wouldn’t hurt.
APRICOT: Gretel, Red Riding Hood! The Princesses, have they made it to the Queen’s lair.
RED: Not yet.
GRETEL: But they’re on their way.
RED: Snow White helped us to this here well –
GRETEL: We were not feeling too well –
RED: Nope, we weren’t –
GRETEL: But anyways, we were just hanging out here and Cinderella and Aurora found us here and they just left.
RED: Yeah, like 2 minutes ago.
GRETEL: Pinocchio is leading them.
LILY: Oh bless that boy!
RED: Yeah, and the Fairy too.
VIRGINIA: I always told you I liked that fairy, haven’t I?
APRICOT: Girls, we’re headed there now. Those Princesses are going to need all the help they can get. With all of us working together, surely Cinderella, Snow White and Aurora can defeat her.
LILY: Come with us. The Queen won’t go down easily.
APRICOT: With the return of the Princesses, we can be strong enough to stand for what’s right.
VIRGINIA: Amen, sister!
RED: Sure, I always liked them.
GRETEL: Yeah, me too. Except I’m not sure I’m up to defeating the Evil Queen today.
RED: Oh please, Gretel. They can’t do it by themselves.
VIRGINIA: Don’t worry toots, we got your back.
GRETEL: Uhh, okay. But only because I’m feeling better.
APRICOT: We have a Queen to defeat. Come.
They all scurry off stage.
SCENE XIV
The Queen’s Evil Lair. CINDERELLA, AURORA, PINOCCHIO, and the FAIRY quietly and cautiously dart on.
PINOCCHIO: This is it.
AURORA: I can’t believe she’d leave her castle unprotected. Surely she knew we were coming.
CINDERELLA: Something doesn’t feel right.
PINOCCHIO: Cinderella, look! He points to the cell in the back.
CINDERELLA: Who’s there?
TINK: It’s Tink, and Prince Charming.
CINDERELLA: Prince Charming?
SNOW WHITE: Where’s the key?
AURORA: slowly, suspiciously, It’s right here. She gingerly picks up the key from a side table. It seems too easy. Apricot said defeating the Queen would test us unlike anything we’d even experienced.
CINDERELLA: Come on Sara, she grabs the key, We don’t have time for this. The sooner we get out of here, the better.
She unlocks the key and TINK flies out
TINK: Peter is in the dungeon. I’ve got to go get him.
PINOCCHIO: I’ll go! You stay! He runs off stage.
SNOW WHITE runs to AURORA and CINDERELLA and they embrace. In the doorway of the cell, PRINCE CHARMING stands and clears his throat. Everyone steps back, except for CINDERELLA. They lock eyes. They share a moment.
CINDERELLA: Hi.
CHARMING: he bows.
CINDERELLA: she stands transfixed, everything else forgotten. I’m Cinderella.
CHARMING: I know. I’d never forget you.
Beat.
CINDERELLA: Should we go?
CHARMING: That sounds like a great idea. He boldly takes her hand and the two lead the rest as they begin to leave.
Without warning, the EVIL QUEEN, RUMPEL, and the WOLF stand in their way.
QUEEN: Oh, going so soon? She stretches her hand forth and in the same smooth movement, pushes the party of escapees physically back. My powers grow stronger every moment that the three of you “princesses” are here. You are worthless. You succumbed easily to the temptations of greed, vanity and selfishness. You place yourself far above others and look down your nose at them. You are rotten. And I have won.
SNOW WHITE: struggling to stand You’ll never win! You’re the greedy one.
AURORA: You’re the one who’s vain.
QUEEN: You think that I don’t know that? You try to insult me with the values I hold most dear. Vanity, selfishness, cruelty, they’re my best features. To RUMPEL and the WOLF, Seize them.
The RUMPEL, and the WOLF surge forward, yet are stopped short. From off stage we hear…
VIRGINIA: singsong. Oh there once was an Evil Queen, she looked like a warty bean. She sits and she rots, on her stinky old cot. Oh how we hate that old Queen.
VIRGINIA enters flanked by APRICOT and LILY. GRETEL, RED stand determinedly behind them.
QUEEN: Oh good, you’ve decided to join us. She uses her other hand to control them and brings them next to the others. Now, this is so delightful. Wouldn’t you say? Control of the entire kingdom is at my fingertips. Hmmm, now what should I do? Rumpel, seize the Princesses, the rest, are, expendable.
CHARMING/MICE/GRETEL/RED/BEARS: How dare you! You’re despicable! No! Please!
QUEEN: Laughs. Oh that I cared. Rumpel!
RUMPEL and the WOLF start forward. Out of nowhere, PINOCCHIO runs center stage.
PINOCCHIO: That’s your problem, your highness. You don’t care and that won’t get you anywhere. Now, Peter!
PETER PAN runs from behind RUMPEL and the WOLF and traps them in rope.
QUEEN: No matter. I can defeat you on my own. The goodness is slipping away, I can feel it.
CINDERELLA: No!
QUEEN: Ah, Cinderella, you can speak.
CINDERELLA: throughout the monologue, she struggles to overcome the Queen’s powers over her. The only one without goodness, is you! You isolate yourself and therefore you are weak. You don’t know what it’s like to have friends that really care about you. You don’t know what it’s like to help a friend in need, or, meet a new one. You don’t know kindness or compassion or love. You are the only cruel, vain and selfish one here. We are strong because we are kind and we have each other. Cinderella stands free and strong in front of the QUEEN. AURORA and SNOW WHITE join CINDERELLA and grab hands. The PRINCE stands on the other side of CINDERELLA and takes her hand. Slowly, and one by one, the creatures overcome the QUEEN’S powers and join hands in front of her.
QUEEN: How dare you! She waves her hands in an effort to gain control over them, but no power is to be had. She has grown weak. Seize them! Rumpelstiltskin! Spotting PINOCCHIO Pinocchio! You worthless, good for nothing-
CINDERELLA: Face it. She slowly circles behind the QUEEN. Your ways have rewarded you with nothing but loneliness and despair.
The line of characters slowly advances on the QUEEN.
PINOCCHIO: runs towards the QUEEN holding the QUEEN’s mirror in his hands. I’ve got it, Cinderella!
CINDERELLA: Now, Pinocchio!
PINOCCHIO takes the mirror in front of the QUEEN as CINDERELLA simultaneously pushes the QUEEN through the mirror.
With a defeated scream, the QUEEN disappears.
Breathless, nobody moves, stunned at what just happened. Then all at once, a joyous eruption. We hear “We did it! Good job! Finally, the Evil Queen is gone!” etc.
AURORA: How did you know what to do?
CINDERELLA: It was Pinocchio’s idea. Thank you Pinocchio, I could’ve have done it without you.
VIRGINIA: Uh, Cinderella, what should we do with them? She stands over RUMPEL and the WOLF
CINDERELLA: I’m not sure, Rose?
AURORA: We could lock them up?
SNOW WHITE: Until they come around?
CINDERELLA: Yeah, good idea. I think they’ll come around eventually.
PINOCCHIO: Way ahead of you, your Majesty. He bows slightly. There’s a bit of a tussle, but PINOCCHIO and PETER PTAN successfully put the WOLF and RUMPEL in the jail cell.
CINDERELLA: to AURORA and SNOW WHITE. It’s over.
AURORA: We could go home.
SNOW WHITE: Yeah.
CINDERELLA: You’re right. We can go home. She steals a subtle glance at the PRINCE.
LILY: picking up on what passed between CINDERELLA and the PRINCE. You don’t have to leave you know.
APRICOT: Now that you are here, our powers have been restored tenfold. We can send you wherever you’d like.
SNOW WHITE: And if we wanted to stay?
APRICOT: We would love that dearly. Our Kingdom needs its rightful rulers…
AURORA: I’m staying. No questions asked.
SNOW WHITE: I’m staying too. This is where I belong.
Pause.
CHARMING: And what about Cinderella? He walks to her. Will you stay?
CINDERELLA: hesitates. I think I have some things that I need to fix in my high school, people who deserve apologies. But I’ll come back. This is my true home.
EPILOGUE
The QUEEN sits center stage as a group of girls in gym clothes enter.
GIRL 1: Ew, what are you wearing?
GIRL 2: Is that a crown? What are you, the Queen of England?
All laugh
GIRL 3: You look ridiculous. Maxi dresses are so last year.
QUEEN: You shall all be punished for this!
GIRL 1: You shall? What, are you living in the eighteenth century?
All laugh and exit as GIRL 4 (who looks vaguely like CINDERELLA) walks up to the QUEEN.
GIRL 4: Hey, are you alright?
QUEEN: Of course, I’m alright.
GIRL 4: Here, can I help you up?
QUEEN: I do not need your help.
GIRL 4 offers her hand and the QUEEN reluctantly takes it.
GIRL 4: Come on, I think I have some extra clothes in my locker.
They walk off stage.
END